2 Hearts in search of a Title
by Rebadams7
Summary: You think you know the Cullen's, Bella and Edward? This time the new student has a very different perspective on Forks, and Bella- she really loves to fly. This is looking at Twilight from a very different point of view. Enjoy and review.
1. Chapter 1

**TWO HEARTS IN SEARCH OF A TITLE**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer created these characters. I am just borrowing them for this adventure!**

Chapter one, from a Forks Perspective:

For some reason, I kept an old alarm clock in my room. It wailed over the piano sonata that had come up on my I Tunes; snapping my train of thought. I grabbed a black hoodie, with a Celtic design in grey on the back, from my closet; and pulled it on, fluffing my hair with my fingers, grabbing my bag and keys from the floor and headed down stairs. No reason to bother with a mirror – I had no intention of making a fashion statement. Alice caught me on the landing, fixing me with her judgmental stare.

"Tough night?"

"Always, Alice, always" I exited the stairs, gave Esme a kiss on the cheek as I passed through the entry hall and out the front, following my brothers and sisters.

"Enjoy your day." She called after all of us.

Right. Forks High will really be the highlight of these 24 hours – at least there will be something new to observe in my purgatorial laboratory. Lately I was in the habit of fooling myself into thinking I was studying the social and biological thought trends of adolescent minds. The potent sea of hormone-induced aspirations had not changed all that much over the past decades; just the knowledge and boldness of youth had crept up over time. Problems had grown, technology offered some fixes and some new opportunities for mischief, but the core thing was still the same.

Love, Lust or some combination of the two was still the most desired, the most motivating, simply the most thought about item on the list.

It was a world I could observe, but never comprehend.

I'd never had even a crush – at least none I knew of. I love my family, but going with the Greek, no eros had touched me. – I was alone, unpaired.

Maybe that part of me was traded for my skill. My extra hearing could hear all, thoughts, all hearts and minds laid bare to me – so maybe that's why my own cold heart was silent.

I replaced that with a desire to leave a little good behind. Recently, I'd taken the hobby of fixing up older, sporty cars, driving them while in renovations, then donating them to charity. Rosalie had given me the idea and she supplied expert assistance under the hood. My current chariot was an older Saab convertible. "Born From Jets." It was as close as I could come to flying each day – at least the commute to Purg Hi was made bearable.

The news of the day – we were getting a new student in my class – Junior year – even had Alice bouncing as I pulled into the student lot. She pounced on me even before I was out of the car.

"I can't wait to meet the new student – Chief Swan's…?"

"No Alice, I have no idea if it's a boy or a girl." Seems the enrolment had only been decided in the past few days.

We were already inside when the roar of a truck filled the lot. _New student_ crossed all minds, but we still weren't sure who that was.

The morning droned on; English, Civics into French class blurring into another without a look at the new one. Thoughts of this new student were still fleeting, still guarded. Unusual, yes, but I knew that lunch would provide a chance to see with my own senses.

We were sitting together, our usual spot, with our little bubble of space surrounding our quintet like a force field. Fitting in like crown jewels in a Target display case – a little too nice to be mixing with; observing the lunchroom when the 'popular' juniors came in and took their usual places – plus the new addition.

I looked over to a pair of intense, green eyes, full on curious, then they cast their gaze away, off toward the others at their table.

Odd, no one is that blank, that thoughtless. I heard the others give the usual spiel – _aloof family, interesting grouping of couples, never mingle with us…_

"Earth to " Emmett waved his hand near my ear, then over to Alice, looking lost in thought, but lost in time would be a truer description. We replied almost in perfect unison

" Nothing, major, nothing to report."

With that, first bell rang and I was off to Biology – what I called overkill 101 – now a good Zoology course, that would hold some interest. Entering the room, I saw the new set of texts on Banner's desk and realized I had the only open spot at my table.

Interesting indeed.

Chapter One continued: – from a Phoenix vantage point.

Goodbye Sun! – Cheesy thought, but it was true. I was headed off to the rain capital of the USA.

I could stand the rain – it was the cold that concerned me a bit. I was no fan of winter sports, per se, and I hadn't been in a cold place since I could remember. Not that summers in Forks were warm, but I just had no frame of reference.

Renee and Phil had put me on the plane with both relief and reluctance – but it hadn't taken a lot of persuasion to let me live with Charlie – a.k.a. Dad. With Phil in the picture, Mom would not fall due to her own devices. It was time for me to get up and out into the world – even a green, wet and probably cold one.

We were late landing in Port Angles, leaving me edgy, with my worldly treasures and wardrobe filling - just two bags, sagging a bit as I scanned the terminal. Charlie was waiting and we both had a tired air. So all I did that night was flop into bed. I would not skip. I didn't want to fall behind.

Morning sun caught me up and then it was thunder and lighting "It's Time" echoed in my mind and the sunlight faded into a greenish brown haze. I opened my eyes to my new reality. I dressed quickly – as a teachers' kid in Phoenix, I chaffed a bit with the restrictions and expectations when I was younger. Here I would be the Sheriff's. I wondered how that would color my reception. I'd never mixed too much with the kids in town on my summer visits and then I hadn't been here in a few years; Charlie meeting me for our 'annual' at more touristy spots.

Dad eyed me as I scrambled around the kitchen, grabbing a bowl and sitting down. Wheaties – not my first choice for breakfast. We could sort out chores later, but I would happily take on the shopping. I was chewing when Charlie spoke.

"Sorry things got so late last night"

"Yeah, not how I wanted to arrive."

"I got you something, sort of a homecoming gift. I thought you'd find it handy." A handy gift – well pocket knives are banned in Phoenix?, my curiosity grew with his next statement. "It's out front, to the side"

I followed him out to the side yard, where a great, bulbous fendered, once red, 1950's pickup, edged up to the beginnings of the forest that borders Charlie's place. I broke into a real grin.

"Wow, I … thanks, I mean it."

"You shouldn't have any trouble with it. Billy Black? You remember him? – He can't drive anymore and Jacob rebuilt most of it, so you have some freedom here."

YES, I can drive myself to school. This truck may be the highlight of my day.

"Dad, this is really great of you, but I think I'd better get in it and get going."

We nodded to each other as I got in and brought the engine to life – LOUD, hey it sorta suits my mood. I can't hide here, so Forks High, here comes Edward Swan.

4

2 Hearts in Search of a Title

by Reb


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

From a Wet, cold point of view

I watched the wipers take a few more swipes before I shut off the engine. I made an educated guess on the student parking lot as I pulled up to the group of mismatched buildings that comprised the Home of the Spartans – Forks High School

.

I idly wondered if I would recognize any faces from my last visit to town – but that was over 3 years ago – so chances were slim to none in a small place like this – 376 students in 4 grades, I wouldn't be blending in much on the first day. No one else was going in, there were few open spaces so I guess I was missing part of first period – this is the last time I'd do that without a better excuse.

'This is what happens when you decide on Wednesday to go 4 states away to school on Monday.' I resolved to man up and deal with the cold and wet, and the new rules of life that were about to come down on me as I hurried up the walkway toward the door marked office.

I found myself in a warmer, cozier room, cluttered with the usual posters and reminders, all done up in that gold, brown and orange that had the 70's show all over it. A Mrs. Cope, from her nametag, met me at the counter as I approached.

"Oh you must be Chief Swan's son. Welcome – he was so pleased when he called to enroll you." She was positively beaming as she gathered my paperwork and went over my schedule and a map of the school. "Have a good morning, just drop off that signature sheet in my inbox before you leave." She rattled off these instructions as she shooed me out the door, but she was smiling. I wondered if there were any pharmaceuticals involved – I had never experienced that level of cheerfulness in a school office - ever.

Pre-Calculus was taking a quiz as I entered, so no introductions, just a quick word with the teacher, a signature, books and a copy of the quiz for me to see where I am. Good, no muss, no fuss. Second period was Civics – where I let Mrs. Wade know I prefer Edward to "Eddie" and she, happily approved. Charlie had not called me that to my face in years; I hope that wasn't what was going around. Jessica was the student to my right in Civics; she introduced me to Ben Chaney in Spanish, third hour. They invited me to lunch at their table. After we went through the line and took our seats, I noticed the group by the window.

I figured I was out of my league as far as any romantic future, at Forks, with those 2 guys and the 3 girls at the table. They looked like they stepped out of Renee's fashion magazines – cool, perfect, sharply dressed to the point I noticed – even the girl in the hoodie with the long dark hair looked like more than the grunge look. I didn't mean to stare, just then her eyes caught mine- so intense, such a dark shade; I quickly looked away, I felt my cheeks redden and burn a bit, as if I was a kid caught dead to rights in mischief. I asked Jessica who they were.

"Oh them, those are the Cullen's – Dr. Cullen and his wife – they foster, or adopted them," She put her hand on my shoulder. "They don't mix much with us – Rosalie, the blond and Jasper, the boy with the longer curly hair are twins – and I believe Rosalie is, uh with the Big fellow, he's Emmett, he's newer to them; they're seniors, oh and Jasper seems to favor the tiny girl, she's Alice – she's, she's odd. I guess, it's ok – they aren't really brothers and sisters, still…." Her face wavered between concern of a sort and jealousy.

"And the Brown haired girl?"

A girl named Angela answered. "That's Bella. She's smart, quiet.."

"And Aloof" finished Jessica.

Ben also had a comment "She just seems untouchable, y'know." He shrugged his shoulders and I tried to concentrate on remembering everyone's names and eating. Wheaties just don't hold up in the cold for long. First bell startled me. Angela was also in Biology, I followed her out the cafeteria, towards the science classrooms.

Mr. Banner handed me my book and asked me to take the open seat. I walked past his desk, down to the slate topped table where no books were set. I realized I was next to Bella Cullen – I turned to say hello – but her hood was up and her posture was screaming 'Leave ME Be' I had no idea why she was upset – but hey, girls did that in Phoenix too.

I had heard this biology lecture last week – I used the time to speculate on the females of Forks Hi. In the Paradise Valley district, I was way out of my league. The parking lots were full of flashier cars, I didn't even have one there, and flashy dressers, athletes, etc. I knew I had some charms, but I hadn't even really tried for a while. No one there caught my eye – or expressed much interest. Here I had already seen the interest in the girls' faces. Why one of them hadn't sparked anything in me was a mystery.

I kept wondering about the pair of eyes next to me – which seemed to be building a wall, a tense stringing of electrified fence that looked like a hood – even the design on the back, the Celtic Key seemed to spark with energy – between us? I hadn't said one word to her for cripe's sake! The bell rang and she seemed to vanish out of the room like a wisp of smoke. I almost wanted to apologize – but for what? Being a male? Wondering? Frustrated, I left for a chance to blow off steam – gym.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

From a Wet, frustrated point of view

Sighing, I walked out of gym as frustrated as when I had entered. They were having a REVIEW of the rules of volleyball – VOLLEYBALL? WTF? I learned that a few of the seniors had taken to playing their own version, something closer to dodge ball or duck and cover. At least I had been issued my uniform T-shirt and gotten a locker. The only good part was my first grade in gym was 100% on the rules quiz at the end of the period.

If I really wanted to pursue something like pre-med, all my grades would have to stay strong. I wondered if I was kidding myself as I entered English.

The faces in the seats began to look familiar. The teacher was young, Miss T. D. Enali

was written on the upper left corner of the board, along with period, date and title each taking a line underneath. I guessed that was the format for our assignments. A quote was written across the rest of the board. I stood at her desk, reading.

"That which does not kill me, makes me stronger." F. Nietzsche

Miss Enali cleared her throat and I looked down at her.

"Mr. Swan?"

"Yes maam, I mean I am Edward Swan." Her eyes looked at me really – hard and intense? Like I was a new specimen in her lab. I swallowed, hard.

"Hmm, not Eddie, good. Good. I like that Mr. Swan. Find a seat, get out pen and paper, we're going to work on an exercise as a class." She motioned for me to get a seat.

I sat down, three back from the front, the furthest back that I could. I felt unsettled, like something was going on that I wasn't supposed to see. Forks was not the place I had envisioned, not by a long shot.

The next forty minutes were spent writing out our thoughts on that quote, sharing a few with the class and writing our thoughts on what was shared. It was an interesting way to get to know my classmates. Some things were a little silly, like Jessica worrying she would have to wear puce – I'm not even sure what color that is – and it still worked when she had to wear it for a wedding, to Ben admitting he was afraid to drive his dad's big truck in a storm for the first time. The time passed quickly, the assignment was a short essay on the quote. I was feeling pretty good when Miss Enali stopped me as I was leaving. She touched my arm, startling me.

"You kept up well. I'll be interested to see what you come up with, Edward."

I just nodded and swallowed, that strange sensation returning. I tried to shake it off as I headed off to end my day with History.

I ended up next to Ben and Eric for Mr. Dwight's lecture on the end of WWI into the twenties. I could tell this was a favorite part of the past for him. He told it as a series of stories from his family's point of view. A reading assignment, a signature and I was almost free from the home of the Spartan's for 17 hours – was I counting the hours because I couldn't wait to be free – or wait to come back and see what happens next?

I pondered that as I entered the office. I could have sworn I saw that black hoodie with the Celtic Key on it standing at the counter, but when I opened the door, she wasn't there? That girl was like a wisp of smoke – here one second and then gone. Why was I thinking about her anyway? What is up with all the green and clouds and wet? Thinking my mind was playing tricks on me. I absent-mindedly set my sheet on the counter.

Mrs. Cope broke my reverie "In the basket, dear. I hope you had a good first day!" She was as cheerful as ever. I couldn't help but smile as I left her office.

"Yeah, Yes, Yes I did Mrs. Cope, thank you" I realized that I really meant it as I climbed into the truck. I glanced at my phone, I had left it in the truck, not sure of the policy here.

I had two texts.

MOM PLZ CALL me . R u ok

Charlie Meet me at Eva's Diner at 6 dinner

I closed my eyes and grabbed the phone. Hopefully Mom was not too frantic…yet.

Her phone went to voicemail so I left a contrite message that I was sorry I didn't call last night, it was late and I had had a decent first day. I promised to call her after dinner. I sent her and Phil' cell a text that I was ok and here and to listen to her voicemail. Hopefully that would cover things. I stopped at Thriftway on the way home, cereal, O.J., a few snacks were on my immediate list. I planned to ask Charlie about cooking at dinner tonight.

I put CNN on the flat screen for background noise as I worked at the kitchen table. I half-listened to hear if there was any big news in Phoenix? I finished everything but the essay by ten to six. Time for - dinner with dad.

Guy time. That is what I used to convince Renee and Phil that I should go to Forks, and she could have the chance to travel with Phil for the season. It wasn't a lie, even though I wasn't sure how well Charlie and I would fit. I liked to play sports more than watch them, I wasn't as keen on fishing as he was, truth be told, I really would like to hunt.

I'd only done it a few times, once with him when he taught me to shoot a rifle and once with one of Renee's friend's family. Kate was like an aunt to me, and her husband Jack loved to hunt. Deer and pheasant were our game. We'd gone to the Dakota's for a week, and I saw Mt. Rushmore too. I smiled at the memory. It was a few years ago, and now they had a daughter and a son, adopted I think. They had moved east a year ago. I pulled up to the diner. Maybe it was the air here. I was really hungry again.

Dad and I ate in silence. It wasn't busy in the diner, but I still felt like I was under observation. The prodigal son – except that I hadn't done anything bad or foolish, yet. Who was I kidding? I had been so busy looking after mom that making trouble had never entered my mind. I didn't want to be seen as the Chief's son – a.k.a. Goodie two-shoes, normal and boring would do. As I brooded, I began to smell something delicious. As my plate was cleared by Eva herself, I think, it was replaced with a piece of warm apple pie, loaded with cinnamon. I couldn't help but smile. Charlie had a slice too.

"Welcome home hon. This is just a little something from Frank & I"

"Eva, that's really nice of you, thanks." Charlie seemed a little surprised by the gift.

"Thank you, thank you both."

"Eddie" I cringed as she said that.

"Eva, I haven't called him that in years – he's taller than me now. " Charlie chided in a jovial tone of voice. Hopefully with his aid, Eddie could remain in the past.

"Ok, well then, Edward. I'm glad to see you here." She gave me a warm smile, patted Charlie on the shoulder and left us to our pies. It reminded me I planned to talk to him about the chores.

"Dad, this is nice but?'

"Eva and Frank have seen me have dinner here 3 nights of 4 for years."

"Well, I can cook – I make a mean Lasagna, and a few other things."

Charlie put his fork down, looked at me, measuring me up. "Yeah, I suppose you did not get that tall on Renee's cooking. I suppose you can if you want. I don't want you feeling like you have to."

"I like to cook – but we can make it 1 or 2 nights instead of 3."

"OK, deal. We'll both do the tidy up I guess – I've been by myself for years, don't make much of a mess. You?"

"Me neither"

So chores were settled – in one of the longest conversations, except sports, that Charlie and I have ever had.

I was glancing toward the counter, when I heard a car pull up, leave the engine running and one of the Cullen's came in, right to the register. Frank came right out with a large white bag.

"Jasper, everything Dr. Cullen asked for is in here, silverware too. Is there anything else?'

"No, that will be great, I'll get it right over to him." Jasper said as he laid cash on the counter and picked up the bag. "Don't worry about the change, thanks for fixing it so fast." He was out the door and gone almost before I could blink. I turned to see Charlie with a slight smile.

"Dr. Cullen does that sometimes. I can't believe we have such a good MD here, still makes a few house calls – and if a hot meal will help, he gets folks that too."

""Cullen? – Oh, his kids are in my class. " I almost mumbled. I was surprised by his sharp retort.

"Don't listen if you hear things said. It's a small town, they came from a big city, out east and gossip and misunderstanding are half my job. They give no trouble and seem to be close like a family should."

"No, they seem fine Dad, but thanks for the advice." Funny, I wondered if that would apply to me as well.

We drove home, and I went upstairs, opened up my laptop and started my essay.

MY MOVE TO FORKS WILL NOT BE THE END OF ME

English Creative Writing

Edward Swan

When I made the decision at the end of third quarter to leave the sunshine of Phoenix and

come to Forks, Washington to live with my father………………

As always, reviews make the writing go faster!

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	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

From a Cold, Hard, Analytical point of view……

I closed my eyes for a moment listening with my inner ear to the hubbub of the class settling in around me. It was mostly random noise; _filling gas tanks, searching for a favorite pen, who stuffed the owl in the window?….._

My vision, behind my closed eyes, went white, white hot, then ice blue, sky blue, and RED.

Throbbing, pulsing, cajoling viscous red filled my eyes and nose. I did not open my eyes; I did pull up my hood, glad to tuck my hair into its spacious capacity. One part of my brain congratulated me on my choice of a XXL hoodie, while another part seethed. I did not breathe, I Would NOT entertain the crazy string of thoughts – So many, so jumbled I had a hard time choosing which were my own and which belonged to the class.

_Hot_

_I want to K..._

_Cute_

_Chief's kid, Hmmmm_

_I WANT him to ..._

_STOP no one could have him but me????_

WTF. As I pulled deeper into my own mind, the lecture a long corridor in my mind snaking away from the instructor's voice. I began to run through the preflight checks on a twin-engine craft for an IFR flight plan as an exercise in control. It was the first checklist I could run through in my head that would demand all my attention.

How could this be happening? I could not hear him next to me in my usual sense – and I WOULD NOT look at him. I hadn't felt this level of … Temptation? Desire? Ever.

The ache that spread through my being was oddly not without a charm to it. It was as if I was up against a hot, red brick wall – something tugging at my mind on the other side.

This was not just sating the thirst. This would do that, in a spectacular fashion, according to one part of my brain; but there was something else here.

There.

I could hold on for the next forty-eight minutes. I would do that for the family. I had no desire to bring this down on them. One part of my brain imagined the hasty exit a stupid move on my part would require. I had not brought that home – ever and I did not want to change that over one boy.

One stupid human male.

I would not remain here – I would leave this class. I doubted history and lit would miss me much.

I would go see Carlisle.

Blessed with an over accurate sense of time. I was out the door before the final bell had finished sounding.

I scribbled out a quick note and placed it in Emmett's Jeep.

_**Hi**_

_**Gone for a few days - ask Carlisle**_

_**Bella **_

I hoped behind my wheel, exited the lot and waited to hit the gas until I was clear of town.

I love my Saab – it is not the sleekest or flashiest brand of sporty car – but its motto "Born from Jets" should explain my level of love for this car.

Fast.

Powerful.

Closest I can come to flying at this time. I really love the way this calms me; 10,000 feet up I can't usually hear too many other thoughts – just the passengers I take on Angel Flights.

10 miles out of town I turn around and head for the hospital. I need some fatherly advice.

Hell, I wish I could just have a shot of whiskey. I seem to remember doing that a few times before….

I nod to Jennie at the ER intake desk – she points me toward his office. He's not in it. I know she will let him know where I am. I perch on the edge of one of the chairs. I know they are comfortable and welcoming – Esme made sure of that – but I just want to voice my plans – make sure I am not nuts – and arrange my cover.

White coat and all, Carlisle glides behind his desk, analyzing a set of lab results, no surprise on his thoughts.

"Migraine?"

Our cover for sudden absences – since sunlight can be painful for the afflicted, it has given us an alternative to the camping outings that are our meal trips as well as our other excuse.

"Yes, but there is more." I let my sentence hang in the air.

Carlisle gazes my direction, his eyes now revealing his surprise and concern.

"Do tell, Bella?" He steeples his fingers, his elbows resting on the papers on his desk, lab results long forgotten.

"Dad, Dad I almost lost it at school. I have only a slight idea why. I … I have to figure this out."

"Bella, not to worry, I'll cover for you.". He paused, with a very dad look. "Where will you go?"

Where indeed? I had not thought of that, but far from people was my first choice. I figured if I were to light out fast, maybe someone needed a ride.

"Carlisle anyone need an Angel Flight here? Port Angeles? Seattle?"

_**I'll Check**_.

He picked up the phone and I heard him call to the Cancer ward, they almost always knew of someone needing transport – but not today…

_**Wait – there is someone in Port Angeles that would love to get to… Anchorage, to see a family member….**_

I smiled. I could escape, think and not even waste aviation fuel.

"I'll call Scotty and set it up. Don't worry Dad – I'll figure this out – I'll call from Denali – Esm.. er..Mom too."

I was out the door before he stood. Scotty was the only other person beside myself I trusted with the Cullen Hanger – well, our planes were in the hanger listed as private, belonging to IMM Co. (Isabella Marie Masen). I got him on the second ring and he promised all would be ready in ½ hour. I floored it as I cleared town. I would be airborne soon.

I was expecting more give and take with Carlisle. He had been my 'father' since I remember opening my eyes to this life. What I remember of my actual parents went from doting affection when I was small to exasperation as I grew into my teen years. I went from kittens in the barn instead of dolls, to fascination with all things mechanical – not sewing, cooking, etc…When I saw my first plane – it was all over for me. I loved aircrafts the way Esme, Alice and Rosalie loved their men. I figured I was wired differently. I was a tomboy when that term was not a compliment. I snuck out to fly, learning bit by bit from the barnstormers that came through our town for a few summers. At 16 I took all my birthday money and other savings, and ran off with a group of pilots who took me on as a stunt rider. In the day we really did fly by the seat of our pants. I had a talent for feeling out the planes – I knew if something was off before anyone else, and saved a few pilots and their aircraft. If I said grounded, my word was gospel.

To this day, I have no idea what happened the day I augured in, in the field in upstate New York.

I learned our vampire constitution, if you will, was fixed at the time we are changed. I don't think I was a cold bitch, as my dear sister Rose comments from time to time. I like soft, pretty things, I can just forgo them. I like people, I love to help and the Angel Flights help me do that.

I just don't feel like I have a whole heart. Hence, I have no idea what was going on with me today. I am not ready to hear what Alice may see or Jasper may feel. I want to figure this one out on my own.

An idea occurred to me; I could ask my Alaskan Cousins. Those girls are better than a shrink, when it comes to relationship experience. Relationship experience? Where did that come from? My over ample brain is clearly SNAFU – as Jasper would say.

I park in my usual slot near the hanger's 'people' door. Scotty nods as I stride up to my Pieper Chieftain – it's our largest aircraft. One of these days I'll get a Learjet, but for now with living near this airstrip, this works well. I begin to run over my preflight checks, then I double check my paperwork, flight plan and see that the cabin is stocked for the passengers comfort – I would be taking 3 to Anchorage to see a family member recovering from an accident. One more set of pre flight checks, a walk around. I listen to Scotty, thinking I am the most organized, most careful pilot he has ever seen – not female pilot, just pilot. I love this century for that fact. I slip off my hoodie, put a band on my hair, the ponytail being my preferred style for flying. I slip on my headset.

This is my happy place as I taxi down the runway.

Later, as I finish securing my craft on the private strip on our land near Denali, I debate running or driving to the house. I decide to keep up appearances; drive to the house, leave the Mountaineer and run over to Carmen & Eleazar's home. The run through the dark forest, a quick bite (yes, bad vamp humor – really bad for that moose!) does not calm me as a dark run usually does. I feel on edge, keyed up like an athlete before the big game – and I have no idea why.

I stop and pull out my blackberry – it's red but I still call it black – and that irritates me tonight too. I send a message to the family in Forks:

AT CE HOUSE

SAFE

MORE LATER

B

I still sound like an old fashioned telegram when I text – old habits die hard – right?

I am nothing if not a creature of old habits.

They keep my passengers, my family and even my classmate's safe from me.

Habits kept disaster from the school house.

I knocked on the door, I knew they knew I was here, but I was raised to be a polite young lady. I had never felt this young in over 50 years.

If I had ever felt young.

Kate and Irina opened the door. Pulling me into their embrace. "Dearest Bella, come, come in. Carlisle called."

"What did he tell you?"

"You were in a state and need to clear your head. He didn't elaborate much."

I was glad that the reason for my confusion was not all over my face. I grew still, vampire still as I settled onto the overstuffed divan in the front room. It was a chair out of my own time; my youth even. It brought me back to my parents' home.

_**I was remembering the night before I decided to leave with the barnstormers. I was trying to hide my nerves. I had told my mother I was anxious for the Fourth of July dance – I told them I hadn't been asked formally by anyone, but that was a lie – I had simply turned down an invitation. It wasn't from anyone I cared about – someone known for being less than a gentleman to his escorted.**_

"Lies inside of lies"

"What Bella? What lies? You never tell less than the truth, ever, at least to us?"

Irina's eyes were full of concern. I decided to tell them the entire story of the past days.

They might help me sort this out.

"I had the most, ah intense reaction to a new student……

**A/N Gracias always to my fabulous beta who saved us all from giving Carlisle a little too much special power…….**

**As always – follow the link or pres review! It's better than Chocolate for me – and makes me write faster! **


	5. Chapter 5

`Author's note! Bella has a lot to say….

Chapter Five

From an Alaskan Perspective

"So, I dropped a note at school – almost ran him over in the hall – told Carlisle I was coming up, and here I am." I shook my head and took a big breath. "I can't believe I am here – that one bronze haired boy can send me flying."

Kate and Irina had sat, spellbound for an hour listening to me pour out my tale. They exchanged a smirk and I could not believe what they were thinking.

'Oh look at her eyes!'

'She has no idea she is smitten' Kate had the loudest, clearest thoughts, but Edward did not look like Cary Grant, not that Cary was bad looking…

"Edward does not look like Cary Grant – and how could I…?"

"…Like him?" Finished Kate. She turned toward her sister and smirked. Irina stood and grabbed my hands.

"Little one, you are finally growing up. You can't see this yourself, you don't have any experience with it – you LIKE him."

"I …I … How can I? I wanted to kill him…I never wanted to …since…well… ever."

I had wanted his blood – and his, well something about him reminded me of something…I was still confused, but their thoughts were showing me my own, in a way, through their own experiences.

Kate came and put her arms around my shoulders. "Little one, I can't call you that, much longer. Your heart is awake. Your innocence will not be with you for long."

I knew what they enjoyed with human men. They could kindly be described as girls who preferred to 'Love 'em and Leave 'em.' I could not understand their fascination with human males. It was not that I did not like men. I didn't really give them a passing thought. I could appreciate a handsome man. I liked to see well-dressed men. I wasn't a tee shirt and jeans fan – but I suppose that part of my heart did not survive the transformation. Thankfully, when I awoke and met Emmett, he called me 'Little Sis' from the first moment he saw me. It might have been the braids Esme had plaited in my hair?

Happily he found Rosalie in the snow a little while later, while escorting Esme home one evening. My mind was wandering. My mind NEVER wanders. I don't let it. Correction, I used to not let it wander. I was suddenly thinking of a pair of bright, intense green eyes. I realized that Kate and Irina might have a point. What was I going to do with that insight?

Irina looked me in the eye. "Bella, you even made a pun. I have never heard you tell a joke, much less smile. It has touched you."

I had no idea how to answer that. I listened to their thoughts. They were really happy for me. Great. I finally find someone who piques my interest. One problem. I'm not 17 – I was changed at 19. Oh, and I am way too old, too cold, too not human for this. I'm not sure I should even go back.

"What... What I need is a little time to think this through. Quietly though." I twisted my hands around to grasp Irina's arms, giving them a squeeze. We dropped our arms. I folded mine lightly across my chest. "Right, I think I will hunt, clear my head." I gave a nod, looking to each of them.

"Good. Go enjoy yourself. We can talk later." Kate dismissed me with a nod of her own.

I ran west , from the house, seeking something tastier than the deer that were my mainstay in Forks. It was a dark night, but the forest was clear in my sight. I let one part of my mind wander as I tracked my prey. The new mind I was given in the transformation was quick to process multiple tasks. It made piloting so much easier, so much more fun than it was before. It also left me with space to contemplate many other things. I used it to enjoy all the beauty I often missed with limited senses. It gave me a great appreciation for music, even without giving me much ability to make music. I don't think I could carry a tune, and I'd rather listen than play an instrument. I'd learned French and Spanish, and picked up a conversational level of skill in several other languages. I think things are fun. Hunting, flying, reading, being with my family; these things are fun. They make me happy. Yes, they make me content. I saw my quarry – a moose drinking at the banks of a creek.

I swiftly sank my teeth into the juncture of the neck and body. The warm, wet soothing solution to my thirst flowed over my burn, easing but never erasing the thirst.

Those green eyes would erase my thirst – but not for long. What went with those green eyes would fill the sudden hole in my?

My?

I could barely even think the word...

Soul…

Soul? I wasn't even sure I had one. If I did, did it deserve to be filled?

If I did, do I have a heart too? What if he didn't care? Worst of all, what kept me from his thoughts?

I pulled my IPod from my pocket. "Wake me up when September Ends" by Green Day started when I pressed play.

Here comes the rain again

Falling from the stars…….

As my Memory rests, but never forgets what I lost…

The lyrics caught in my thoughts, teasing me. Was I waking up?

It wasn't September it was March. Stupid, analytical brain! The month is not the point. There is something in my memory. Something I need.

Something I can't find.

That is something I will deal with later.

As I ran back to the house, I made up my mind. One little human male was not going to send me running. With a little help from my friends – I'd get by. Uh oh – was that another pun? Yeah, with a little help from my friends.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

TGIF in Forks, no really!

Tuesday was easier. Each day was easier – and weirder. The week was almost over. Mostly it had been good. Each day had brought me more comfortably into the easy routine of classes, homework and twice, to de-stress and to give me something to look forward to, I cooked. I had made more than we could use at any one meal, so our freezer held quick options - and Charlie really did like what I knew how to make.

Wednesday, Mike Newton and I discovered we had known each other from the summer he and his family moved to Forks, he drilled me with a spike in volleyball and it reminded both of us. We had a pick up game of hoops, for old time sake, in his driveway during a break from the daily downpour. I figured I'd go for a run over the weekend, hoping for less precipitation.

Friday morning, as I pulled into the lot, I noticed a convertible – a Saab convertible. I wondered about how much optimism one would have to possess in order to own a convertible in the rain headquarters of North America. I wondered whose it was.

I got my answer after Lunch. Bella Cullen was back, seated with her family in the cafeteria. I glanced over several times while Ben and Eric debated the merits of martial arts in films, versus real life. One part of me was anxious about Biology – the other part of my brain wanted to demonstrate some skills with Ben and Eric. I wanted to impress Bella; to catch her eye. As that thought crossed my brain, I felt a little flushed. Where did that come from? My Sensei would not approve. Aikido was not a tool for showing off – he had told us that since I was small and was taking the class with Renee. I decided it must be girls. Girls made guys do foolish things all the time.

Yep, yep. Wishing I had my jo. I mentally rehearsed the first kata.

I thought I had left the cafeteria in plenty of time to be the first to our table in Biology, yet as I entered the room, I saw Bella in the seat nearest the window. She spun a key ring on her finger; I noticed the fob had the lionesque figure of the Saab logo cut into it.

I decided to break the ice, "is that your convertible?" I asked with a smile in my voice as I pointed to the fob she twirled with her left hand.

She lifted her eyes from the table and I felt her butterscotch pools bore into me with surprise. I suddenly felt warm.

"Born from Jets, so they say," her curious eyes continued to hold mine.

We just regarded each other as Mr. Banner began to hand microscopes around the room. When he dropped the tray of slides on our table; I broke the silence.

"I didn't have a chance to say hello the first day, I'm Edward." I stuck my hand out towards her. "It's true, Chief Swan is my dad."

"Ahh." Her eyes caught mine again as she nodded instead of grabbing my hand.

She straightened up, ghosting her fingers over my hand as she spoke.

"I'm, I'm Bella. Welcome. Sorry I was preoccupied earlier."

I felt something, like a magnetic pull as we sat there. All this rain must be messing with my senses or the electrical impulses in my head.

The class started and we were assigned to work in teams to order the slides in each box. I had completed this lab before Christmas in Phoenix. Bella eyed me suspiciously as I confidently began to write the first response on the lab sheet after only a cursory glance in the eyepiece.

"Sure? May I take a look?" She questioned me as she reached for the microscope.

"By all means. Please verify my identification." I tried to keep my voice neutral. She had no idea I was in AP classes – or that I wanted to be pre-med next year.

Her eyes were first speculative and then delighted as she agreed with my assessment.

"You're good. You know this cold."

I pulled another slide out and fixed it to the microscope, "I've had practice; I have a goal."

"Well?"

"Well what?" Over the space of a few beats, I continued checking and ordering the slides.

"Spill. Goals are like sunny days in Forks."

I blew out a long breath as I finished ordering the slides in the box. "Pre-med. That's the goal. I want to end up in Medical School in 5 years." Holy S! – I had not admitted that to anyone before.

"Good. Good plan. You should shadow someone at the hospital," she turned her head forward, towards the front of the room as she spoke. Then she blinked slowly and closed her eyes. I watched her hand reach out and grip the edge of the lab table – hard. Her wrist was slender, almost alluring as it slipped out of her sleeve. She turned her face back to me. "I just mean it is good to see what you are getting into before you sign …on."

"Yeah, that would be nice. It's seems more possible here. Phoenix? I wouldn't have a shot there." I mused, almost to myself as I finished writing. Mr. Banner walked by at that moment. His eyes scanned the lab sheet.

"Finished?"

"Yes sir. Bella and I are done." I nodded toward my partner, swallowing. Am I nervous for some reason? I glanced over. Yes, yes I am nervous. Was it over, or because of, Her? What would be the difference?

"Good. Edward, Bella. It is complete and correct. Excellent!" He picked up the report and set the trinket on the table. It was a small potato, painted with shiny gold paint.

"It's a golden nugget of knowledge; he likes to reward us right away." Bella allowed herself a slight smile as she spoke. It almost reached her eyes and at that moment I realized she was beautiful. Renee called it inside out beauty.

Not outside pretty.

Inside, hidden, beautiful. I had never thought that about a girl before. I watched her open her book. She was reading, sending out her let me be vibes, but they were softer, more like let me be, please. I could do that. I pushed the prize toward her side of the table.

"Keep it for me, I don't have much luck with trophies. I'll be – it will be safer with you."

She didn't say anything, just slid her hand over the knobby nugget and pulled it toward her.

We read in silence till the bell.

I found her in several of my next classes. In English I again felt under the gaze of Ms. Denali. We listened to a few more of the essays and were told to be ready for a new quote on Monday. I always felt lighter, freer somehow when I left that class.

In History, we were assigned seats in strict alphabetical order. This placed me 3 seats behind and one row over from Bella. She looked uncomfortable in the front row, trying to make herself invisible. Still she sat straight, almost regal in her chair. Her hair was loose today, chestnut waves over each shoulder; even the fluorescent lights didn't wash out the glints of red and gold hidden there. She wore a blue sweater and tailored khakis that slid into her low boots. It was soft, yet crisp. Sometimes she looked out the window and I could study her profile. It was almost chiseled like a statue, a bit of an upturn on her nose – and she'd bite her lower lip sometimes; perhaps when she was deep in thought.

We discussed the biggest factors in the technology of warfare in WWI – poison gas or the airplane? Bella never spoke, but I watched her body language. Ok, caught me, it was a good excuse to watch all of her, but it seemed like she'd love to speak, but held herself back for some reason. Once again she seemed to disappear like mist in the desert after class.

The music room was locked, so I headed for the student lot.

Her car was gone from the lot by the time I got to the truck. I climbed in and turned on the radio. A really old song was playing - "Spooky"

_Crazy little girl like you_ – sang the Zombies. I kept thinking about her hair – and how her sweater fit her just so. How the sight of her pale wrist fascinated me. I let my mind wander a bit to the radio. The song ended and was replaced by the farm and timber report. Still the song lingered in my mind – and I was comparing everything blue I saw to her sweater.

W T H? I suddenly had the urge to call mom. I put the truck into gear and finally left the lot.

Once again was I just excited it was Friday – or excited about who was FINALLY at school today?

**A/N So, anyone wonder who is teaching biology? And why is Edward disappointed the music room is locked? Reviews who can answer either question get teased!**

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	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Little nuggets.

I barely registered what I carried so tightly, yet lightly in the palm of my hand. Edward; he gave it to me. It was the first real gift from… from a human in - in so long I could not remember.

He looked so reasonable today – a cotton plaid shirt open over a smooth navy tee shirt that left little to the imagination. Really, he probably looked a lot like the other boys in Forks – except that I had never really looked at any of them. It usually took Esme, Alice, or even sometimes Rose to direct my attention towards someone.

The burn was there, but the other emotion that went with it was just as powerful. Was this… this sensation a crush? I thought back to last night when I arrived back at the house.

It was just after 9PM, the three couples were sitting in pairs around the great room; Rosalie and Emmett at the piano with Rosalie playing softly; Jasper on the loveseat with Alice's head in his lap and Carlisle and Esme on the couch, her head on his shoulder, listening to Rosalie.

They all looked so relieved when I walked into the room. Alice just smiled. I was glad to be home, but the first thing I noticed in myself was an ache – a longing. Jazz eyed me speculatively. I went and stood beside the loveseat.

I felt as if a tear should fall down my cheek; my cold cheek was painfully dry, but I rubbed my hand over it anyway.

"Bella, Bella I have never ever felt this coming from you,'' Jazz turned and gazed up into my face. "Bella, Bella, you are jealous and longing for someone." He sighed.

"I guess this is what a crush feels like."

"No!" Alice sat up and gazed out. "You – The chief's son. Are. Going to Prom"

"Alice, no boys… no human boys ever talk to me. I can't. I shouldn't even…"

"He will and you will. TALK to him." She crossed her arms over her chest and bobbed her head like Barbara Eden in "I Dream of Genie."

I looked around the room again. For the first time it was not just my wanting to leave the couples to their privacy that made me run. I seriously could not stand to be in that room, with all that – that, whatever it is that I don't have and I realize I don't have. Eighty years of emptiness suddenly crashed down on my silent stone heart. I think everyone can hear it crack as I flee up the stairs and into my room.

Whatever that is – I now want it too.

I hit my ITunes and Clair De Lune filled my room. I sank to the floor on my knees, gazing out at the river.

Esme and Carlisle are knocking not two minutes later. I rise to let them in. They are keeping their minds quiet. Everyone in the room had been shocked by my revelation – their thoughts of pity only added speed to my exit. These two; these are my parents now. They're aching to help me; I want their help. Right now I am lost and I have no instruments to guide me.

They come and sit on either side of me on the gold chaise. Esme puts her arm around me. '_Oh this has to work out – human or not. I almost gave up after Carlisle left Ohio. My girl!' _Her thoughts remind me of the story of their first meeting. She was human, just 16. He had the strength to leave her then. Fate had her fall back to Carlisle, 10 years later, on her worst day. No one had been waiting for me. Hadn't I had my worst day?

"Bella, I wondered when you would… when your heart would awaken?" Carlisle broke the silence with his question.

"Carlisle, I don't know if it has. I'll just have to see what happens tomorrow. I know Alice has her ideas – but she's translating the Brothers Grimm into Korean and I don't want to know yet," I looked at each of them in turn. I gave a slight smile. "I guess I will have to be a teenager a little longer."

"Bella, you have always done the right thing; you have always found the right way." Carlisle's speech was comforting but his thoughts were more revealing. '_Her eyes – always so cool and steady, now so bright, the Chief's son – how can this come to good?'_

Esme understood my confusion better than the rest. "This is just a beginning. You're home now; we're all here for you. Don't forget that." '_We've all been there; she'll find the way and the time.'_

They left me to my music a few moments later. I decided to go for a run, to see where the wind takes me. I slipped out my window, landing on the grass with nary a sound. The forest is but a green blur to me. I am not aware I am following a faint scent until I arrive at a clearing at the edge of the forest, where Forks meets trees. I can hear a pair of heartbeats in the house. The police cruiser is out front.

I am staring at his house.

I turned tail and headed home. I put on my earbuds as soon as I was in my room, pressed random on ITunes and waited for the sun to rise. I dressed with a bit more care this morning. Alice didn't look too askance as I passed her this morning. Now I am holding this painted potato like it would disappear.

All the rest of the day I carry my nugget in my hand. In my head all I can see is a bronze haired boy with emerald eyes.

It's soothing at first. It puts all the noisy thoughts to the background.

I want something.

I have not really wanted anything in over 80 years.

I had wanted tinker toys once.

I wanted a plane of my own – I figured out ways to get those things.

I wanted something now – that I could not – should not - would not - Figure out how to get.

Something else was holding me back. Keeping me from trusting my ability.

Thou shalt not - I should not covet.

I should not want…

A human…

Like this…

He will want someone warm and soft, someone like Jessica.

No. I hear a growl in my own mind.

'_HE IS MINE' _


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Moms to the Rescue!

On the drive home, I thought about who I could talk to. I had no idea what Charlie would think about me – well me, and the opposite sex. Somehow I just knew Mom or Phil might give me more clues – at least in the beginning. The way I had been acting today – Charlie would probably just read me the riot act about stalking!

I had texted and emailed Mom, I was pretty sure I was overdue for a call anyway….

As the phone rang I toyed in my head with a message I would leave if it came to that.

"Edward Anthony!" My mom's squealing of my name at top volume caused me to jump in my place and pull the phone away from my ear at the same time. I banged my elbow into the kitchen counter, filling my vision with stars and causing me to let out a colorful string of words…in my head. Remember; one dad has guns, the other swings a baseball bat for a living. I always watch my speech around her.

"Love you too, Mom." I tried to be nonchalant. HA!

"Well, I knew you would call eventually. What's her name?"

"Wha...?"

"Edward Anthony Swan, I have no doubt you would prefer to keep things to texts and emails as much as possible. It's not my birthday or mother's day – so spill!"

"Mom! I've been in class all of 5 days. How…?" I didn't get to finish as she went into a rant about how a 'mother knows her child', how she was sure this was part of my need to go north, how happy she was… I let her continue as I set the phone down softly and pressed speaker. I pulled some fish out of the freezer.

"EDWARD, AM I ON SPEAKERPHONE?"

"Uh, I just wanted to start dinner."

"That's fine dear, I'm sure you are home alone. Now, it's your turn." The line fell silent and I picked up the phone and gently put it to my ear.

"Caught, guilty as charged. She's really..." I paused, searching for the first right word.

"Important to me – it's important I do this right," I sighed just a bit.

"She'll know; she'll know by how you treat her, not just what you say. Now, tell me more about her."

We spoke for the next few minutes, I mentioned how she was quiet, how she had intelligence and grace. I didn't mention the eyes, the beautiful hair or how she looked good either sitting or standing: no matter what I had seen her in, she looked beautiful. Frankly, other than the blue sweater, I had no idea what she had been wearing.

"Edward, don't over think this. Once she hears you play, she'll know. If she doesn't …well then it's not meant to be. It would be her loss." My mom took a gentle tone as she wished me a good night and pleasant dreams.

Deep in the Forest, about ten miles outside of Forks…..

Emmett and Jasper were locked into another duel of the X-box – Call of Duty…whatever. I had props for Jasper, he and I shared military discipline. Emmett, however; he loved to play soldier, was always spoiling for a fight, but his free spirit had me wondering if he'd even make five minutes under a drill sergeant's icy glare. Rosalie watched from the opposite doorway.

"How much tonight?"

"Five thousand," Rosalie answered without taking her eyes off the screen.

"That's not as many dollars as usual."

"Euros."

"Euros?"

"Yeah, Jasper found some in a satchel in their room, really pretty ones from France. Emmett wants them for me." Rosalie sounded almost proud that her man wanted her to have the prettiest money.

Emmett always wanted Rosalie to have pretty things. I have never seen a homely, ugly or average vampire; aside from myself, but Rosalie was the Miss America of our world. Emmett was fairly young and Esme more so when they found her in the snow, in Rochester. Emmett had known she was the one from the moment he saw her – and that was at the Eastman Ball in 1931 where Carlisle was the hot new surgeon and had to be introduced. Esme was stunning that night in a silver gown, Carlisle wore a black tuxedo, Emmett and I, Esme's brother and sister at that time were both impressed by the pair. I had worn a pale blue dress, and Emmett was also in a black tux. Rosalie attended with her parents, and was seen dancing with Royce King, the son of the local bank's president. I recalled him looking at me – and as usual, taking a step back.

Our allure, our scent, our manner – this is all designed to draw you in over your natural human tendency to survive. If we are merely calm, most folks just give us a wide berth. If we use our charm… wham! We can have you. I prefer to keep my bubble. I don't think I'd be that alluring anyway. I've always been in the shadows; first Esme, then Rosalie and even Alice, with her perfect fashion sense. My only submission to femininity was my long hair. I'd always been tempted to get a bob, but knowing there would be no going back now, I'd left it long. That night, it was half up- half down, curled. I remember he reached toward me, as if to replace a stray lock, and it repulsed me. I had glared - and he leaned away. Rosalie later looked like she had gotten a prize. Not six full months had passed before Emmett and Esme found her under a broken streetlamp, left bleeding, near death.

While we waited out her transformation, he confessed he had wanted her from that first night. He had almost left the family, when Esme convinced him to come home. On their walk back was Rosalie. Esme called it destiny.

Emmett felt she was his gift, and he always wanted her to be happy, to have the pretty things in life now that she lost the one thing he couldn't give her – a child of her own.

I sank to the opposite sofa, deep in thought "_Emmett lives to make Rosalie happy, Rosalie for Emmett and she pines for a child, Esme lives for Carlisle, Carlisle for Esme and Medicine, Alice for Jasper and to make the world more beautiful, Jasper for Alice and his atonement…'_

I felt Esme's hands on my shoulders, in a very human gesture. '_Oh Bella, what do you wish for?' _"Bella, the heart wants what it wants – you have to listen."

If I let my mind go, since we don't dream, we daydream; where would it take me…

Charlie had liked dinner, but was almost pushing me out the door. I convinced him as I washed up the dishes, that I was still getting used to Forks, elevation and all, so this first Friday was not a problem if I wanted to watch a little TV with my dad and call it a night.

I hit the pillow, tired from all the new things I saw this week; wondering who would be calling me out, in my slumber….

I became vaguely aware of the sun; clear, real and warm. I was entering a clearing ringed by tall pines. The soft breeze had the scent of salt from the ocean, picked up wildflowers as it came across our path. I was aware I was walking with someone. My eyes stayed forward as we made our way toward the middle. Then, not sure if it was by request or command, my eyes closed. All my senses heightened. The feeling of grass, shushing under my feet. The whispers of the wind and chirping of birds from the trees, the thump, thump of a heartbeat in my ears and my fingers found the other hand, our fingers entwining.

We faced each other, still not looking, eyes lost in the black velvet of our own lids.

**Author Notes**

**Thank you to my readers and reviewers – You keep the muses entertained enough to hang out with me. **

**Reviewers get teased – and a special place in heaven too!**

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	9. Chapter 9

**A/N**

**Thanks to my readers everywhere! – glad you like my little twists – dreamy lemons commence now!**

Chapter 9

From where we can no longer dream...

I continued to stare out at the forest through the windows beyond the family room. I hadn't been seeing the trees. Alice came up behind me and leaned her head on my shoulder.

"It's hard to wait; hard to be in the waiting place."

'_It was so hard for me as I began to see Jasper's face more clearly…' _Her thoughts wandered back to visions of her early days of searching for Jasper.

"I can see what you mean," I smiled as I looked at Alice's eyes – they were now focused right on Jazz.

What I had just seen in my daydream- no, what I felt- was more than just my musing. I knew the meadow was real. I had been there; flown over it. I grabbed my jacket, more out of habit than need.

_Where does she go when she runs?_

_The sweet one grows up._

_Go Em! THAT'S MY monkey man…_

I ran my route.

His window was now dark.

I watched, getting only his father's dreams of_ a big fish – and running into a dark wood, his hand on his holster…._

Still, only the two heartbeats caught my ear. All quiet on this front.

I ran on, gaining elevation. Trees blurred, as much as they can in my vision.

Past the long ridge, I found the clearing. The clouds broke for a few seconds, the moonlight entered the circle of trees and I was in my vision.

I wondered when and why I would return – I just…

I just _knew_, staring across the space.

Things would change.

From a Father-Son place….

I felt Charlie sit on the edge of my bed before I heard his voice. "Edward?" He shook me lightly.

I opened my eyes, not startled by the sunlight as much as the surroundings – _wasn't I outside – in a meadow, kissing? "_Uh, Ch..Dad. What time is is it?"

"It's 6 - I was checking, like you said last night, if you wanted to come along?" Oh yeah, I had said something like that…but the sun is shining right now. No, I'll wait for rain to fish…maybe one of Charlie's friends will want to hunt too. My thoughts ran across my sleepy face; I watched Charlie watch me hopefully. I just couldn't waste the sunshine.

"Ah, Dad, I think of fishing here as a good thing to do…when it's a bit rainy?"

"Oh, oh, OK. What are your plans, then?"

I scrambled, then my eyes lit on my weapons case leaning on my desk, "I'm gonna do my thousand cuts, and check out that one Dojo in Port Angeles, maybe… I'll be home by dinner so I can cook your catch. Mike Newton said something about watching March Madness too."

At the mention of 'thousand cuts' Charlie gave me an odd look, then he remembered I did a martial art without trophies or tournaments. Not, that I don't have a competitive streak; I just prefer to out run my opponents in Cross Country, or bring home something from a hunt. Besting someone instead of helping them to improve was not my style. I'd never been a boy scout, but that had been one of my nicknames at school in Arizona.

I was thinking over my last class as I listened to Charlie's reply.

"Oh good, I'll have to check where I am in the pool, Syracuse is my pick this year. See you tonight. " He pulled his hand across his mustache as he spoke, then turned and left the room, I heard him go downstairs as I sat up. I was remembering more of the dream.

_I could remember the hands, the scent of strawberries and sea breezes and golden eyes…and a lot of...of kissing?_

That was what had caught me. I dream; I'm a guy, I usually have those dreams about, well, more random, more blatant body parts. Not so much tender touches, holding hands and cool soft lips on mine. I shook my head, determined to keep my cool. I wandered downstairs; deciding that doing 1000 cuts without breakfast would be a bad idea.

After I set a few things in motion inside (laundry's gotta get done somehow – right?) I put on my Gi, wanting to do the whole thing properly. I spread a small rug I had found in the closet on the grass, knelt in seisa, bowed to the east – that's tradition, even though I always feel like bowing towards Japan; stood and began slicing the air with my Bokken. I counted down in my head, with random on my iPod. The first song to get me going was an old one I had put on iTunes for Renee – "Celebrate" by Kool and the Gang; I think it was from their wedding

Oh whatever.

997, 996, 995, 994

I let the weight of the "practice sword" do the work for now; trying to empty my mind of all but the numbers. I smelled strawberries in the wind. I felt a little something; fighting my concentration so I counted out loud "908, 07,06…."

I congratulated Rosalie on her lovely currency as she laid it out on the dining room table. Carlisle called out a hello as he passed through, he was checking on a few patients this morning even though it was his weekend off. I listened as his car pulled away, followed by another; Esme and Alice were going shopping in Seattle and Rose and the boys were planning to go 4 wheeling. I wasn't usually here at this time.

I decided to go for another run. For some reason I had yet to fathom, I did not feel the need to hop in a plane and disappear for the weekend – my usual plan. I stopped as soon as I felt the sun on my shoulders – the clouds were thinning.

I clung to the tree line as I sought out the shade. I climbed into the foliage, finding myself hidden as I looked into the land behind the Swan house.

I heard the swish of wood against air. I smelled the unvarnished scent of wood I could not name, but was fairly sure it was Japanese in origin.

I climbed a bit higher to get a better vantage point. I looked out to a pleasing sight.

The wind ruffled his bronzed locks, his profile strong as he cut the air. The Gi was not a thick one, but thin, more suited to Arizona and sun than Washington's damp. It still afforded a wonderful view of his sculpted body.

For a human, he was chiseled well. Not bulky, like Emmett, not as wiry as Jasper, but somewhere perfectly in between. His bare feet contrasted beautifully against the grass. I'd never thought of feet as alluring. I wondered what the rest…

I returned to the - mental wandering – of the night before, without a conscious thought to do so. I was back in the clearing.

I felt the hands clasped, then warm hands sliding up my shoulders. I was looking into pools of bright green as our lips met. Ha, they didn't meet; it was more like a three point landing, on warm velvet. The best, softest velvet ever, tasting of cinnamon and wood, smoke and leather and his hands – his hands were moving, sending tingles along my skin. They were now on either side of my face, his thumbs brushing my chin, his lips sucking lightly on my bottom lip….

His scent, full and potent, lifted on the breeze, hit me like a wave at Oceanside. My reverie broken, I saw him sink back to his knees, bow, his bronze locks brushing the deep green grass; stand again and begin to stretch his hands and arms in soft, repetitive patterns.

What the Hell? What was I doing here?

I am now officially a 100 + year old? – Cougar? ( HA)!

The other half of my brain said I was a teenage girl who had never been kissed.

Really kissed - _as far as I could remember_.

Which one was I?

I went still in the branches. As the clouds thickened, I resolved to seek a path through the confusion.

I'd go and talk to Carlisle.

I hissed a bit through my teeth "THREE, TWO, One."

I sank back to the little rug, seiza feeling like cool water to my legs. I again bowed, my head touching the edge of the rug and my forehead being tickled by the grass. Maybe I'll cut that next….

I stood, stretching my limbs and beginning the Aiki-Taiso movements, without conscious thought. Ah, my body knew what to do even better than I. Good. For a few minutes I let my mind just be.

It occurred to me a run would feel really good….maybe? that old fire road – after I cut this grass…

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	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: WOW Ten chapters**

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Chapter 10

In a white home, at the edge of the forest.

I perched on the edge of the sofa, watching each breath he took. Edward had been through so much in the past few hours. He seemed calmer when I placed my hand on his head, so I left it resting there; my fingers brushing his forehead and occasionally twirling his hair, his soft bronze hair that had curled slightly after the dampness of the woods. His face was so soft, so approachable in the act of sleeping. His eyelashes were thick and dark against his cheeks. The colored flush that had angrily spread over his continence had lightened to a soft, healthy hue. I stared at his lips, trying to lose myself in thought.

When I reached home, I had found Carlisle in his study and I asked him to hunt; so we set off from the edge of our property, following a herd of deer as they drifted toward civilization. This ridge was rarely frequented by anyone in town. A few years back a heavy rainstorm had washed out much of the old logging / fire road and it had now been abandoned by walkers and joggers, the trail entrances obscured, grown over and forgotten. It was our close, convenient spot.

We didn't get a chance to really talk, with the scent and the sound; as the perfect essence of HIM was born on the breeze. Almost the same instant as that reached us, the steady heartbeat stuttered, sped up as "SHEE….T!" Echoed off of the tree walls.

We reached the end of the ravine where the trail had edged along the steep side, leading down to the creek that ran along the bottom. Edward seemed to have awkwardly rolled to the bottom, but he was a little too still for either of our sensibilities.

It only took a blink for us to reach him. He was lying just out of the water, eyes mercifully closed against our speed.

"His ankle looks sprained, not a worry, but his head seems to have taken a solid hit," Carlisle commented as he quickly examined his sudden patient. Before he was fully alert we got him to the top of the ravine, Carlisle then left for home to get his car as I stood watch.

What was coming over me? I had not been able to breathe until I saw his cheeks flush with color and his chest expand. I would have given… given anything to see his bright green eyes. I sent a silent prayer to a God I wasn't sure would listen.

I was rewarded with a flash of emerald.

"Whaaa?" He mumbled, trying to sit up against my hold, as gentle as I could figure to make it.

"Shhh Edward, you ran right off the road – or the road just left you."

"Bella!"

"Bella? Why are you here?" His eyes were pretty.

Pretty focused.

Full on curious, looking at me.

_Why, why was I here? _

_You._

_You Edward are a big reason why I am here. _I couldn't admit that to him, at least not yet. I could barely admit it to myself.

" You are almost on my land now – so I should be asking you." I chuckled a little bit in my response. He rewarded me with a sheepish grin as the sound of Emmett's Jeep growling up the trail drowned out any of his possible speech.

A short trip via the ER for an x-ray to rule out the worst of my fears ended with Carlisle assigning me care duties until Charlie came home. Edward had been a bit embarrassed to

find himself in this situation, but glad to have the offer of resting at home. Going home with Charlie in the cruiser – it just made him cringe a bit.

So here I sat, gazing at his lips – his beautiful lips.

They were parted ever so slightly in his sleep.

I had never been this close to a human, since, well ever.

Sleeping under the stars, under a wing? It was almost an errant thought, it three pointed on the edge of my train of thought, distracting me – or enticing me to move a bit closer.

Tempting.

Tempted.

I

Was

Tempted.

Tempted to brush my lips with his.

He shifted on the couch, leaving me a bit more space. He didn't wince at the contact his shoulder made with the cushion. Carlisle had to pop it back in, he remarked it was pretty limber, but he had still kept him out for that part.

"So soft, your hand feels perfect and soft" Edward mumbled,

_He was talking in his sleep – or maybe the Percoset was._

"Magical.." He reached for my other hand, lifting it to his lips.

I held my breath

He kissed my hand, sliding it along the velvet and bristles of his cheek.

I felt off kilter, almost dizzy. Ohhhhh so, so…

"Magically Delicious"

"So, so I'm an Elf?" I tried to keep my voice light, but it felt thick to my ears.

"No, no you're too special for that, Beauoo… Bella?"

I knew it was the drugs, I knew it.

"Sorry, I'm drifting here, tell me about it later." Edward finished

I brushed his head again, the hair whispering on my skin, sending jolts along my arm, all over...

He continued to hold my other hand, pulling me closer to his face.

"No worries. Laters," I ghosted my fingers across his forehead.

"Laters, laters, I'll kiss you better, laters, better, …..Bella…in my dream…"

I froze, waiting for the venom to well up…

waiting, waiting.

I felt his breath on my cheek as his scent soaked into my skin.

I brushed my lips across his.

_Oh God, _

_It was warm velvet, sweet and smoky._

_Damm Carlisle, what are you planting, making me wait here. _Who was I kidding – I could be sitting across the room in what I guessed was the Chief's favorite chair.

I was old enough to know better – wasn't I?

I sat up, twisting his hair. His hand had fallen with mine to his chest; I could feel each breath and heartbeat.

They were my reality.

My world.

I was in Love

A Fathers' concern….

I'd been startled by the cell ringing on my hip, just after a good long cast into the river. I recognized the hospital ring, wondering why a deputy hadn't taken the call. It was a slight jolt to hear Carlisile's voice

"Chief Swan, it's Carlisle Cullen. Not to have you worry, but Edward had a fall and got a bit banged up. I'm going to bring him over to your house and have Bella stay there until you come back." His voice was informative, not at all anxious or concerned. That helped.

"Dr. Cullen, ah thanks. What happened? How banged up?" I am sure my worry leaked into my delivery.

"Not exactly sure, he was on the old fire-log road on the wooded parcel that we brought on our southern border. Bella found him; his ankle's sprained, he loosened his shoulder and took a good bump to the head. He'll be tender on the ankle for a week or so, the rest should be better by Monday, but the bump on the head...well, Bella can stay."

"I was planning to be back in a few hours, but I can be there in one."

"Oh, good, though he's in good hands- He'll be more alert by 6 or so, and probably hungry, we found him a little before noon, I made sure all was well first."

"Thanks again, Dr.."

"Chief, call me Carlisle," he cut me off.

"Ok… say, what does Bella like on Pizza? The least I can do is feed her for staying."

Carlisle didn't hesitate, "Oh, not necessary, but Bella would be fine with anything."

He sounded warm, and that gave me a bit of ease. I had forgotten to tell Edward that the old road he used to run and play on had been lost to a heavy rain. I had forgotten that he didn't realize Forks had different dangers than the desert.

The phone rang again, this time I would be delayed. Something had killed a maintenance worker at the refinery. I called Carlisle back, warning him of my delay.

Duty called, again I felt I was putting Edward in the back seat, at least I knew he was in Bella's care.

Good hands.

I hung up, and looked over at Bella.

"I don't mind." She replied with almost a real smile

"I figured as much. Bella, we'll do whatever we can for you."

I knew she heard my thoughts. _Care, my daughter, I know about Alice's vision_; _the other vision._

I drew in a sharp breath. Alice had come to me early this morning. She had shared with me a startling glimpse – of Edward and Bella standing in a snow covered field. Edward was in a blue oxford shirt and jeans. Bella was in a dress. – She NEVER wore dresses, at least since the sixties.

Edward's eyes were red

Not crying red.

Newborn red.

Alice had called it their destiny. I worried she'd see it as a disaster.

I hadn't made up my mind.

Yet.

**A/N**

**Some stories reach out and touch you in a way you can't expect**

**Hydraulic Level 5 by Gondolier**

**An Angel Closes Her Eyes by TG10781**

**Have fun seeing Eclipse – Meet the Fellow Fans!**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N WOW to our readers and givers - FGB over 100K - that is SERIOUS money and a force for good in the world. Who says we aren't doing anything important!**

**This one is in honor of my Aikido Senseis - they taught me everything I know - Domo Origato Sensi!  
**

Chapter 11

From an over relaxed state of being.

I smelled Strawberries.

I saw Red.

Sweet, fresh, red –

I was thinking of…

No I was throwing myself… in to a vat of fresh strawberries.

I was nuts.

I'd better be dreaming this crap.

I ached.

I ached all over.

I felt a cool hand on my chest, keeping me from moving. Ok, I ache, so whatever…

Several hours later I realized I was sleeping on the sofa in the living room.

I opened one eye to survey the damage.

I had a bandaged ankle – with a bag of frozen peas on it.

My shoulder was doing a slow burn.

Keith Moon had invaded my head – and he thought it was a new drum set.

What the hell?

I replayed the day in my head: breakfast, 1000 cuts, a run on the old trail…

Ohh – yeah, well, I guess there won't be any more of that – since the trail was gone.

I remember looking up as something fast blurred at the edge of my vision. A deer? Next thing I was in an uncontrolled roll down a rocky, rooty incline of dirt, well mud, really.

I remember hearing Bella's voice – and someone else.

I opened my eyes. Yep, not a dream. I was holding Bella Cullen's hand to my chest.

_Lord, take me now. No wait; let's see what happens…_

"Hey," my voice sounded like overused sandpaper.

"Hey yourself. Welcome back, are you thirsty?" Her voice was so light. Strong and clear, she had a glass with a bendy straw right there.

I was surprised how sweet the water tasted. I still hadn't let go of her hand; I sheepishly un-entwined our fingers.

"Did I say anything?" My heart was thumping; I hoped I wasn't a blubbering fool.

"Well, I'll never tell," she smiled, maybe even smirked a bit.

"I'll owe you my life." I grinned and then grimaced as I worked toward a sitting position.

"You remember much?"

"Uh, no, not after starting my run."

"How did you find that old road? It's been washed out for a couple of years?'

"I played on part of it years ago – I wanted to build a fort just a bit up from the house," I remembered being 10 and bored – finding a small area about100 yards in and bringing a tarp and a few boards; wanting a space of my own – no moving, no changing. "I'd liked the one entrance that was pretty obscured already- so I didn't notice a change."

"Oh, well most of that is on land we annexed, and we didn't need a logging road."

"Uh, so how bad am I?" I was now sitting up, starting to twist around to put my feet on the ground, letting the peas slide to the floor.

"Terminal." Her eyes glittered with a dark humor, then smiled a bit.

"Aren't we all in the end?"

"Oh, some more than others, but you have a while to go. Ah, sprained ankle, you knocked your shoulder a bit loose and you've got a concussion. Hence, the peas and ace bandage. I've got a sling for your arm now that you are sitting up. Car... I mean my Dad wants you to wear it for the next few days."

"Your Dad?"

"Dr. Cullen. He was with me – so, you can meet him next week under your own power."

That explained a lot. She was here because of him. A little disappointment washed over me. That surprised me.

I guess I knew already.

I was falling for Bella.

Fast.

"Not a great way to make an impression on your Dad." It slipped out, with a dejected sigh.

"No, you looked fine."

"Thanks for waiting with me here. I guess Charlie will be back soon."

"Charlie?"

"Yeah, my dad, the Chief "

We smiled, as a secret seemed to pass between us.

"I don't mind being here."

We sat side by side, she lifted my bandaged ankle to the coffee table, her hand so cool and that felt fantastic, even through the ace bandage.

There was something there.

The air felt charged, energized.

Then Charlie's voice filled the doorway as it opened, and the smell of sausage came to break the spell – oh and the loud grumble of my stomach. Behind him was Mike and Tyler, come to watch some of the March Madness.

"Hey Mike, hey Tyler."

"Bella?" They spoke simultaneously, unable to hide the surprise in their voices.

"Yeah, well I see my relief is here. No pick up games tonight; he's benched."

She smiled at me, with my phone in her hand as she stood.

"Pizza before you go, Bella?" Charlie motioned with his chin to the boxes he carried in.

"Thank you, but no Chief Swan, I'll head home now," she slipped from the room so fast I swear I felt a breeze.

Charlie and Tyler got the pizza and drinks set up while Mike turned on the game, remarking it was the same TV, just a little bigger, as theirs.

I noticed my phone was next to me as it vibrated. It was a text from Bella

**Hope you don't mind. I put my number in yours. Open your window tonight; the cool air will help, per Dr. C. Call if you feel worse. I'll see you tomorrow.**

**Bella.**

I slid my phone into my pocket as I stood. Whoa! Head rush. Mike grabbed my elbow.

"Argh! Wrong arm Mike, I think I dislocated that shoulder!" He grabbed the other as I steadied myself. I grabbed the sling, slid in my arm and figured the straps – ah they go criss-cross and velcro around my waist. Relief. I headed gingerly up the stairs, my ankle not completely disabled.

Before going to the bathroom, I went to my room an opened the window; glad I had opened it once already or one handed would be impossible.

I text back; **Done Thx. ES**

The rest of the evening we enjoyed watching the games; seeing who would be knocked out of March Madness. This was that guy time I had wanted – with Phil it was just too strained, too close.

This was my dad, my friends. Perfect, almost.

Not yet…

But there was this girl….._this is new, this is me mooning? Over one girl?_

Thanks to modern prescriptions, I slept well.

Sunday dawned clear, but I did not trust it again. Charlie knew not to ask about fishing, but we did go for breakfast at the diner. The Chief told anyone who inquired about my sling that I'd been out cross-country training. He sounded a bit proud, even.

In the afternoon, he went to fish 'a bit' and bring Billy Black and his son Jacob over, along with KFC – he didn't want pizza twice and not me cooking just yet either.

I sat on the chair in the 'dining room' with my books and laptop, working on homework, when Bella appeared in my kitchen. Dang, that girl was as slippery and silent as an eel.

"I think you slept well."

"Yeah?" _Thinking of you helped a lot. "_Uh, how'd you know?'

"You look much better."

I thought of how I'd looked in the bathroom mirror last night, like I'd gone a short round with a bear, and I smiled. "Thanks again for being there with me."

"Anytime – not that you should… should get hurt again."

She sat down across from me, looking a little lost, like she did not know why she was there or what she should do. I decided to help.

"Uh, Bella, could you grab me a slice of the Pizza from the fridge?"

"Want it warmed up?"

"Nah, I like it cold too."

She nodded, got up and brought me a couple of the cold slices, with a glass of soda.

We chatted a bit about classes, she reminded me to wear the sling until Wednesday afternoon and when I was to go to the hospital and see her dad. Then we grew silent for a moment.

She stood behind me, flexed her fingers and placed them lightly on my shoulders. "Is this Ok?"

They were cool as they began to knead the muscles at the top of my neck, then she moved sinuously over to my shoulders. It was incredible, the energy flowed from her fingers right through my sore points, flowing through and drawing away the stiffness and pain. It was performed with all the skill I had experienced from a black belt, don instructor and Rekki master at a seminar in Phoenix. One part of my brain saw this as impossible.

It should take years to perfect this technique.

The other part of me said 'Relax, this is helping. Enjoy.'

I like this part of me much better.

The sensation continued, electric, cool, soothing.

Best.

Massage.

Ever.

I felt almost as if I was never hurt.

It was right at the edge of too much, too close. She slowly stilled her hands, finally resting them lightly on my shoulders.

The silence didn't need a sound. Contentment seemed to flow between us.

The chime of the mantel clock broke the spell.

"Uh, hey, if you want, you can stay for dinner – Charlie's getting KFC and the Blacks will be here." Her eyes grew dark as I spoke; a chill seemed to render her statue-still.

She drew in a long breath, almost centering herself, like she was performing a Ki exercise. Her eyes looked more serious than her words indicated when she spoke. "Oh, thanks. The Blacks? The Blacks from La Push?"

"Yeah, Billy sold Charlie my truck. They go way back."

"Oh… oh sounds like a guys night, sports I bet on the TV, so I'll take a rain check on the KFC." Her words were right, light but her face looked wrong somehow.

"Ok, then Monday, I'll see you in Class."

She nodded, and turned to go. "Keep that window open, OK?"

I agreed and she once again left so quickly I swear I felt a breeze. I closed my books and wished for a piano close by. I'd have to see if the one in the basement could stand up to a tuning.

I was suddenly filled with an aching need to flesh out and fix a melody that had developed in my head. Renee said to play for her.

What better to play than a composition just for her?

I was scribbling down a few bars on my notebook paper, an old habit from when I was afraid to let Renee know how much I really knew about music. I only wrote out on real staff paper when I was finished. I slammed the spiral shut when I heard the key in the front door. _Why hadn't I heard that when Bella was here?_

Billy Black entered, with his son Jacob providing the extra muscle to get through the doorway and into our house. Jacob looked huge to me. I hadn't seen him in a couple of years, but still, he looked like he was born in an iron den.

"Dang Billy, what are you feeding them on the Rez?" Charlie had come in the back entrance and his voice filled the kitchen with my question.

"Chief, it's not the school lunches, I can attest to that," Jacob answered as if he had been getting that question a lot. "It's not steroids either, sir."

Billy laughed. "You don't look too tiny either Edward; you have to be taller than Charlie now."

Before I could get a word out, Charlie responded "Yeah, but I can still outrun him – for now. He took a header down the old Rand property road – the one the Cullen's annexed."

"Cullen's?" Billy's tone was strained, "I didn't realize their… that the land ran so close. That must be it."

"That's what? Dad?" Jacob responded. He was giving his dad a strained look, like '_Not this again.'_

Just then Charlie announced that dinner was served. That broke the moment and we all commenced a favorite activity – eating!

After the trash was cleared away, Billy and Charlie settled themselves in with their "vitamin R" - aka Rainer Beer, in front of the television. Billy wrinkled his nose a few times, but didn't make any comments. Jake and I wandered out to my truck; I wanted to ask him a few things, and my truck gave me cover to get away from Billy's amazingly good hearing.

"How's Red been running?" Jacob asked, with obvious pride. Billy had given him all the credit for the condition of the truck.

"No complaints on how she gets me around. Hey, your dad seems ready to complain, about… I dunno – does he think the house stinks or something?"

"Nah, uh it's the Cullens - I think."

"Cullens? The Doctor and his kids?"

"Yeah, dad and Charlie got into it once 'cause the reservation clinic was closed and someone from La Push threw a fit about going to the hospital in Forks, some of our Elders are suppositious old women," Jacob had kept his voice low and almost hissed out the end of his declaration.

I just looked at my truck.

"I'm not supposed to talk about it, but… "

"But what?"

Jacob let his breath out in a hiss. "Ah, it goes back to an old feud between the cold… I mean the Cullen Cov … er family and the Tribe. Our tribe, well we believe we are descendants and brothers with the wolves. We caught the cold folk – I mean the Cullen's on our land. They are sort of old, ah, enemies of the tribe – but their leader convinced my grandfather, Chief Ephraim Black, that they would cause no harm or fight. So we are 'at peace' but we still aren't supposed to like them," his face reflected his skepticism and amusement.

"Well, some of them aren't too hard on the eyes?"

"Eh, Swan, you looking?

"Jake, come on – I'm not blind!"

"Nah, you just run with your eyes closed. How'd you get back up that ravine – it's way steep now, a sheer drop of maybe 50 feet?"

50 feet?

Cold Ones?

"Ah, shit if I know – maybe they had me on a dogsled? I was pretty out of it for a while."

We looked at my truck; he mentioned that double pumping the clutch from 2nd to 3rd gear seemed to keep it running better.

We watched the end of the game, then I excused myself to get some sleep. Billy and Jake called it a night as well.

I felt a little guilty; I waited till I heard Charlie's door shut before I fired up my laptop.

_Crikes, it's not like I'm looking for porn…_

I found a site on Native American lore. I typed Cold Ones into the search tab.

The result said simply: see vampire.

What?

**AS ALWAYS - Please REVIEW and of course , be teased!**


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

So a Vampire walks into a Bar…

The rocking chair at first glance seemed odd in the bedroom of a boy. I expected sports equipment and a poster of a current hot female – I still remember Rosalie's reaction when I gave Emmett the Farah Fawcett poster in the 70's…

His room was a blend of little boy and man – only the rumpled shirt on the floor seemed age appropriate.

The drawings of a younger child were mixed with postcards – upon closer inspection it became clear that the Chief had placed a lot of these here. The faint lines from folding were evident in the moonlight.

His desk was cluttered with notebooks, some with hand stenciled staff's – rough compositions and chords and notes covered the pages. A second notebook was a real musical one and only neat, complete bars of music filled it.

More mysteries from the silent mind were evident around the room.

His room.

I finally settled into the rocker, the Mexican blanket and pillows making it cozy, I sensed it would be very appealing to a human.

All the time spent observing the room; I did not neglect my duty. I observed Edward.

I found I missed his green gaze, but a sleeping Edward; lost in a land I could no longer travel held a new and different appeal, I no longer tried to stop myself from looking. I could tell myself that making sure he had no complications was my purpose.

I was a pretty good liar after all. I think it came with the lack of core temperature.

Edward was on his stomach, his bronzen locks turned toward me, his shapely back visible over the comforter's edge.

Earlier I had placed my cool hands on his back and neck, hoping to ease the pain and speed the healing in that shoulder. His skin was so warm there, and the knots in his muscles needed release so he would mend. I pressed lightly with my fingertips. Dragging the pain up, over and out of his body, again and again, with slow, paced strokes.

I had finished with a chaste kiss to his back.

In the moment I told myself many things: this was to help him, this was what Carlisle or even maybe Esme would do; that it would make school easier.

All true and yet, as I rocked I realized I craved his touch – or the feel of his skin under my fingertips.

Perhaps if I was a human girl with human hormones and experiences this would make more sense. Kate told me I would know; my heart would head in the right direction before my head. I should observe and enjoy the journey.

I continued to gaze over him. Watching the soft rise and fall of breath.

What would have been my stomach lurched as if a hard landing had just touched down.

Not my plane.

My heart.

Is there was a merciful God in heaven – or is this the play of Loki dancing around his flames?

I love him.

It echoed something old and faintly familiar, but that was only a mere blink in passing.

It was at once too close and intimate in the room, and yet not either of those.

I may have flown the globe, wrestled a bear or two, graduated many times in the past decades and now, overcoming the scent of corpuscles tuned to my exact frequency; this all mattered not.

I was a girl, unkissed, wishing, praying. "_Dear Lord! Protect him –for me - from me?"_

I could not bear the monster in me wanting him…

With me,

To like me,

To Be Like Me.

I could leave. I could leave right now, and rejoin the family after the next move. I'd wanted to study more French, in France, right?

No, I can't leave.

Ever.

He spoke, thick with sleep and yet so clear.

"Bella."

I flitted in and out of home for the rest of the weekend, not wanting to cross paths with my siblings just yet.

I was a mess, and I did not want to hear speculation or scorn, or soothing eminence from anyone.

I decided to wallow in my own head for a bit. So this was the feeling behind the thoughts in most of the heads at Forks High.

If thoughts had flavors – this was a great one, and then it turned bitter-or sour as doubts circled the hope that kept sparring the darkness in my chest.

He seemed young and pure, untainted. I was none of those, and yet I could not feel complete revulsion in myself over wanting to unravel his mysteries. What little remained of the girl who flew, seemed to be in control of this…this crush.

No, it's not a crush. I'd been 19 for seventy years. I was so not having a crush.

I spent Sunday night in the rocking chair. His health assured; this was for my own elucidation.

Monday dawned without the sun; a gentle thrum of rain announced the commencement of a new week. It made a soothing rhythm on the Saab's roof as I returned home. I was able to slip unannounced into my room to change for the day. I again regarded my wardrobe with a serious intent, I did not want to fade away today, just blend in with the student body. All right, truth be told, I wanted to look like I belonged in that body. Alice appeared in my doorframe, regarding me with her cool, critical, runway gaze.

"Not those grey trousers, they're too formal." '_Do you want to look like a military officer or a lawyer?'_

"Suggest. Don't pass out; just point me in the right direction," I kidded her with a half serious heart. It was a RARE day for me to ask her assistance, she usually left an outfit or a bag in my room, with instructions.

"The Lucky jeans, with one of these," she held out a form fitting jacket, soft jersey with a hood, "one of your camisoles with a top over it."

I nodded and dressed under her watchful eye. "Pass or Fail?"

"Wear or Wear not, there is no Fail …in my outfits," she let a giggle escape as she tried out her best Yoda imitation.

"Your thoughts betray you. You may be the only one here who isn't ready to throttle me."

"As if that would do any good. You are and You can handle this." She held up her hand and her thoughts continued '_I have faith in you, sister. I know that good can, and should come of this and the rest of our idiot siblings and spouses will learn. Carlisle and Esme are being cautious; they worry over you too much.'_

A few moments later I found myself surrounded by family, Emmett speaking even faster than his thoughts.

"Belly, Helly – that is almost, dare I say cute, lit'le sis."

"You're not hiding. You, you look like a girl." Rose regarded me like a predator of sorts, like I had gone rouge. Esme regarded us for a moment, then came and put her arm around my shoulder in what I estimate a motherly hug should be.

"Rose, nonsense. Its time Bella let her light shine."

Jasper kept his tongue still and his mind even more so. He did not look upset, simply deep in thought. Carlisle came down the stairs behind me. As he gave a meaningful look to each in turn, his voice was the calm tone he used with his patients when he wanted them to remember his instructions. A tone rarely heard in our home.

"This is Bella's time. She's entitled, and we are well to wait and see the course and outcome."

A look passed between him and Alice and in that flash I inferred information had come to her and she counseled with Carlisle. I knew the drill; some things were kept so as to not influence the decisions. It was grating, but necessary.

The morning passed in a blur. I was attuned to the student body as a precaution. Strangely the biggest buzz was the fact that I did not look like a "grunge magnet".

_Had I really let myself look that pathetic?_

If Rose was right, and I was destined to be dust by spring; I decided to enjoy the ride.

I purposefully made sure I arrived in the cafeteria after my family, and after Edward was seated. He was in the 'popular spot', with Jessica on one side and Mike across the table. I saw him wince and rub his neck.

A vampire's brain can process many things at the same time. I could sense the unease in the other students as my plan unfolded.

I could hear some of my siblings curse the day of my turn.

A dark haired pixie was cheering me on.

I saw Edward's eyes.

Beautiful green sparks.

When he saw me.

Rosalie's thoughts summed up my own. '_Beelzebub has a shiny new pair of ice skates and a place to use them. Scheet!_

I mumbled "paved with good intentions," as I smiled and stepped around to stand behind Edward and place my hands on his shoulders.

"Still sore from Saturday?"

From a one shoulder, sick of the sling point of view

Although I felt a lot better than I expected to, Monday's drive in was a bit of a challenge, and I was attempting to be really good about wearing that sling – so I could slip out of it for at least a good half hour after school. I had cleared some practice time on the baby grand this week and I had no intention of missing any of it.

Jessica, Mike, Angela, Eric and the rest were helpful, sort of, but I wasn't really comfortable in any seat at school. By lunch I had a real 'pain in the neck' – yeah tell a joke too, maybe about a vampire and a werewolf and a bar…

My head was all over the place today. I kept daydreaming of my night's dream. Of an angel watching over me; making me feel…well, feel? Crap, I really must have hit my head harder that I thought.

At lunch, I rubbed my neck, wishing for a cold pack when I was greeted by a smiling set of butterscotch eyes. Isabella wasn't hidden in an oversize hoodie. She looked…

She looked really good. Her jacket fit close to her curves, and her hair wasn't hidden, it was wavy and soft around her face and her shoulders. Almost before I could speak, she moved behind me and placed her hands lightly on my shoulders, sending a tingle right through the pain, a tingle that settled in unexpected places. Her voice was light, almost teasing.

"Still sore from Saturday?"

"Yeah, a little."

"Don't try to imitate a Range Rover. Let me see what I can do. May I?" Bella did not hesitate; she lightly kneaded my neck and shoulders. I couldn't see her smile, but I was sure she wore one. The expressions of my tablemates – the astonishment on their faces told me this was the exception – the exception was a Cullen. The silence grew heavy, as their eyes got bigger. Angela's voice popped the tension bubble.

"That's really nice of you Bella."

"Thanks, but my Dad and I saw the incredible roll. Luckily I had taken wilderness first aid, so I was able to help him."

Another beat of silence, and then with Mike's question, the bubble dissipated and a bit of normalcy seemed to settle around the table.

"Wilderness First Aid? Did you get certified? 'Cause Dad's been saying we should offer some seminars this spring at the store."

Conversation spun around me, but I paid it no mind. Bella's soft touches and finger strokes over my neck and back lulled me. A tap of her fingers on my shoulder indicated her finish.

"There, better. I'll see you at class." The bell almost cut off her parting words.

I left with Mike at my side. "A Cullen, eh? Ed, I don't like it."

"Man, she's just being kind, Besides, Jessica is way more into you than me."

"Ya think? "

_Yeah, I do Mike. Jessica's for you. Bella, well Bella can have what she wants._

_Me._

Biology was a shy affair, but not cold or indifferent. We seemed to be stealing glances at one another

After the final bell, I realized I really did feel good enough to go ahead with my practice session. I decided nothing too strenuous, a little Mozart and maybe some Cole Porter.

I missed playing. I'd check Charlie's basement to see if the old upright was still there, but nothing beats a Baby Grand, except a Grand.

I'd learned to play from a host of teachers, and I learned to read music by the time I was 8. I played whatever I found to read and I began to compose little bits when I was 9. One of the teachers in Phoenix shot a short video of me when I was ten.

It landed at Julliard. I had only learned of it last spring, when there were auditions in Scottsdale, and they wondered if I was still playing. I was too young to go off to NYC, but I did go and play them two arrangements. Garrett Adams, a professor, told me to finish up High School and call him.

It was my nice little dream. Forget accounting, or medicine, (a loathe and a like) I knew it was a pipe dream – It's in New York, It's expensive. It is not a shoo-in that I could be on that level.

Right?

Music was the fire in my soul. I might still study Medicine. That is such a good plan.

Respectable

Honorable.

Yeah, but everyone needs to dream. Might as well dream big, it's no more expensive than a tiny dream and I think the end of either will hurt just as bad.

That is not today.

So I play.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N Yes, dear readers - I'm back from the land of Weddings and Class reunions...Mrs. Meyers owns what she owns and I make up the rest as I go along, Plagiarism is naughty, hommage is appreciated...and of course, if you like this , tell your friends - if not - tell me why so I can strive to do better!**

Chapter 13

It's not always a bad number; 13.

Days pass. Nothing spectacular happens; this is Forks we are talking about. I think a three-car pile up would be huge here. Bit by bit, I'm better. Classes are classes; I'm playing after school. I'm getting good grades. I'm seeing more, ah, looks.

Where were these girls in Phoenix? Why don't I care so much now?

Prom Fever is settling in. Monday the announcement of the theme was made, by the principal, with an honest to god drum roll – A Night in Monte Carlo. Tuesday the posters appeared and on Wednesday the Junior and Senior boys had question marks of yellow and blue construction paper placed on our lockers. From the giggles of the freshmen girls, it was easy to figure out who had been so busy.

The atmosphere inside made up for the outside. A slow drizzle permeated the daytime hours, making daylight a misnomer. Wednesday morning the clouds were still heavy but they had ended their persistent drip. I woke up an hour earlier than usual. I really wanted to see what and where I had done to myself. I dressed quickly and quietly, slipping out of the house at first full daylight. I headed toward the entrance to the old road. Passing the remnants of my old fort, I started gingerly up the trail. The foliage was so thick in spots; the ground was more to damp than soaked. I stepped carefully up to where the road crumbled away.

I stared down the embankment toward the creek at the bottom. My trail of slips and rolls was still visible. I could see the rocks and roots that marked my face and arms.

There was only one set of footprints – pointed back up the trail.

It gave me something more to think about as I drove in.

I found a new quote; in T.D. Enali's class.

"_**Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad." **_

**Henry Wadsworth Longfellow**

The class was unusually quiet; each of us lost in our own head as one after another came in, noticed the quote, and sat.

I wondered if I had missed something then I remembered, one of our local Guard units had been activated a few weeks back; Charlie had mentioned losing one of his best deputies to the deployment. Maybe someone had gotten bad news, or maybe it was just the idea of bad news.

Miss Enali entered the classroom, looking severe in a grey suit. Her eyes were cold as she scanned the class. She walked around the room then back up to the front, perched on her desk, crossed her ankles and stared around a bit before she began to speak.

" Who here thinks the President, or the Principal, or their parents are cold – maybe not always but sometimes?"

A few hands rose, she continued. "Who has been short with a friend or a family member?" She continued to scan the classroom, her expression softening.

"Has anyone here been so sad, that they can't bear to show that sadness anymore and so you shut down for awhile?"

Her last question still had hands in the air. She simply nodded and motioned for us to put our hands down. It was a silent signal to begin our essays. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Bella giving the teacher an odd sort of stare, as if they were communicating.

The rest of the period was spent writing. Quickly enough the regular day ended and I was able to make my way to the music room. I smiled at Mr. Kuhn, who reminded me to lock up as he tossed me a key. Being the son of the chief of police had a perk after all.

The basic scales and arpeggios brought out the ache in my shoulder, but it was not uncomfortable in a bad way, more like muscles needing to be stretched and warmed up, the dull feeling easing as I worked up into a few Bach pieces. I moved on to Mozart and worked on a few of the required selections for Julliard. I liked to imagine someone could hear me, but I had rarely played in front of an audience. I preferred to think I could play only for those I wanted to listen. I finished with playing mom's favorite, "Clair De Lune" by Debussy.

I fingered a melody that had played at the edge of my conscious mind for a few days. It made me think of brown waves and golden eyes. I began to ponder the quote from earlier. What secret sorrows might she have? Someone with such warm eyes should never have to be so cold to the world.

I closed the piano, shut off the lights, locked up and headed for my truck. In the fading light of spring, I was the last car in the student lot.

On the drive home, I mulled over everything I knew.

Bella was quick, strong – if she carried me up that embankment. Hell, I couldn't carry my own weight up that steep slippery slope.

I sighed. I'm crazy – either the green or the bump on my head has gotten to me, or…

I wasn't going to go there yet. Everyone at school would describe the Cullens as cold; like our assignment. Bella no longer seemed cold to me. I mulled that over as I started dinner.

I saved my essay for last. I decided to go old school and pulled out several sheets of paper.

**_People who have experienced a great pain in their life may need to protect themselves from further injury. There are many ways to accomplish this._**

I wrote from my own experience of one summer when I was 8.

From a well walled off point of view:

Harry Conic Jr. (?) was on the radio in my car when I finally tore myself away from the hall where I could hear the music.

That boy could play. I can't hear a flittin' bit inside his head, but I could hear his passion in the music.

Sweet music.

Sweet Jaysus music – as Maggie would call it. Maggie was maybe the one other Vampire that understood me a bit. Now I knew the connection in my wormholey fast brain.

"I just haven't met you yet." Sang out the radio. Maggie hadn't but I…

It hit me like a blast from an oven door. If I could blush at the thoughts that ran… the ideas that sprang in my head – I would be as red as a Valentine heart.

Alice grabbed my hand.

"It works out – I've seen it."

Suddenly I'm just a teenage girl in my head again.

"C'mon my belly girl – we need Esme." Her cheery admonition broke the spell and I started for home.

Esme was not in the house when we returned. I stayed up in my room, editing up some items for homework and fiddling with my music collection. As soon as I heard her tires on the gravel, I headed down to the porch to greet her.

She came up the steps and sat next to me. Her eyes had caught mine, and in that way that only mothers can delve, she came to immediate knowledge of what to do. I only think I am a good mind reader. I swear Esme can read our souls, if they still exist.

Her arm slid around my shoulder and our heads turned toward one another.

"Isabella. Isabella I know you can hear what I am going to say. What you don't do, is hear the how, or the WHY I do. You know the story, as you know facts in history. Listen to my voice this time." My eyes must have registered my bewilderment. "It will help."

She drew a deep breath, a human moment if it were, and began.

"For some reason, few folks thought to look up when they look for someone - even if that person is known for climbing trees. This fact kept me safe from prying eyes, as I would sit in my perch, observing the world, dreaming of a distant place or a different life. It was my haven and escape from the reality that my world was closing in on me. Surely, a marriage was being plotted by my parents." Esme's fists balled up for a moment, and she rose to her feet, walked down the steps and paced on the gravel as she spoke again.

"My father owned a builder's mercantile, dealing with the construction and carpentry tradesmen. I loved to look through the house plan catalogs with the smell of sawdust and new findings that sometimes came with them. My mother was seemingly content with her tasks at home; caring for brother, my father and me. She seemed to relish the bearing of her duties; a fine cake at the church picnic was her pinnacle. I was her pet project and her constant worry was that I would not be a proper lady. Marriage was not first in my mind, or romance, really. I was interested in teaching; it was the only occupation that a proper girl should even consider. I was rarely allowed near the business, but I enjoyed my few times there. Even then I truly loved caring for and imagining changes to buildings, especially homes, I was always imagining moving a window, painting a wall, shaping the land for a better entrance."

Esme paused, gazing into my face, her eyes registering my comprehension of the why of it all beginning to dawn in my brain.

"I was sitting, dangling my legs in the intensifying breeze, when the scent of rain registered. I had kept my eyes closed after finishing a detailed sketch of our house on my pad. I was usually more careful, but the sudden clap of thunder and flash shocked me - I found myself slipping off my perch with no purchase on any adjacent branches. My shriek was hidden in the wind and thunder and the pain as my leg struck the ground was comparable only to the pain of transformation - that is why this memory was still burned into my brain. I dragged myself towards our porch, sure that my worst punishment awaited; nothing would be over spoiling my dress and notebooks. Sadly, father found me first, as he drove his wagon home. He stopped at the house just long enough to get my mother after lifting me to the back of the wagon. They gathered blankets to place over me, tying a board to each side of my legs. Sometime after that I lost consciousness. When I awoke, it was dark. I could see a window at the foot of my bed, my leg in traction angled above my waist. I remember that because it was the first time I heard my personal 'Shining Knight's' voice." Esme stopped and took her place, seated at my side. She turned to me and took my hands as she continued her tale. I heard her voice as I saw her dim human memory.

"_Glad to see you awake, Miss Platt."_

_His voice was like warm honey to a sore throat, it was soothing and sweet, lingering just long enough. He held my wrist to check my pulse and it was cool against my too warm skin. In the dim light I could just make out his face, it seemed to shine with a light all its own. He pulled a chair up to my bedside, settling in as if to hold a conversation. I marveled at the attention I was getting._

"_Thank you Dr.?"_

"_Cullen, Miss Platt, Carlisle Cullen at your service." _

_I suddenly wished at that moment, that I could really take advantage of his statement. _

"_Thank you Dr. Cullen. May I ask, will I be here all summer?" It was already hot in this room and I feared the warmer months were yet to come. I hated being without the wind; that and sunshine were my favorite sensations in the entire world._

"_No, Miss Platt, a month at the most and you shall be able to go home. I think you'll only need crutches for a few weeks past that. You had a clean break; it set well and will heal nicely." His words were a balm. I was sure I would be a cripple, heaping disappointment and frustration on my parents. This news eased my heart to a considerable degree. _

"_Dr. Cullen, please call me Esme." He nodded and I thrilled when I heard him speak my name_

"Every night for three weeks, _**Dr Cullen**_ spent at least an hour at my side. He seemed to sense I could not sleep in the summer heat, his cool presence soothed me, with his honeyed voice we discussed art and architecture. I asked my mother to bring my sketchbook; and showed him a few of my designs. I signed one and he was glad to take it." I could no longer hold her gaze; I dropped my eyes to the grass as she continued.

"I wanted to transform into someone older and proper for him; to see myself at his side, an equal, a perfect wife, free to pursue my interests, paint, build, make a comfortable place for him, a partner - not a servant. My dreams came crashing in on me when he sadly announced he was performing his last rounds, he had taken a position in Chicago and was leaving in a day."

I again saw with my special ear.

"_Take care Dr. Cullen, your care made this all bearable, so I know you will do wonderful work in Chicago." I did not cry until I was sure he had left my ward. I wanted him to remember my smile. I found my drawing, framed in his study, in the house south of Ashland._

Esme was sure I was seeing some of these memories, the smile on her face showed her consideration. Carlisle arrived; I listened to his tires on the gravel and awaited his presence. He came, sat beside Esme and wrapped his arm across her back with a gentle squeeze, kissing the top of her head.

I sensed Carlisle was remembering his side of their first meeting.

_I truly cared for all my patients, yet for me, she was a shock to my heart when she came in to the hospital on the back of that wagon. I carried her into our treatment room and set her leg- something in her face and features reached out to me, filled with me a, a longing, a curiosity as to what was so appealing. I hadn't paid attention to that in a long time, and I couldn't resist. I was - lonely. I decided to find out._

_Her parents were in a state - they were still at the hospital late that night - they were waiting for her to wake up so they could, could inform her of her disobedience. I convinced them it would still be hours before she awoke and I had to convince them to go home and return in the morning. I hadn't even seen her in her bed yet, but I could not imagine a worse awakening than those two angry faces._

"I found her in a quiet corner of the ladies ward; at least she had a window for her long, immobile stay." He spoke aloud to me while looking toward Esme. His features softened a further degree as he recalled the first sight of her.

"I found an angel, caught in a web of rope and plaster, her eyes called to me and for the first and only time that meeting - I, I considered. I considered just sweeping her up and taking her away - I just couldn't stand the thought of her world. I wanted to give her more." He remained beside Esme, touching her cheek with his hand; the other was on my shoulder, my hand covering his in one fluid motion.

Carlisle continued speaking "Our eyes met and I saw the sweet 16 year old girl, caramel curls spread on a pillow, eyes then closed, yet not at rest."

"I went the next morning and began to search out a new position, far from Columbus, because I knew I could not remain that close to her. She was still so young. I prayed for her happiness. I never realized the lengths God would go to answer that request." Carlisle smiled at the memory.

He continued aloud. "I had no right to suddenly be thinking those thoughts, on so many levels - and I could not get you." He looked into her eyes. "I could not let you alone - I had to figure you out, as if that would help."

"It did, Carlisle, it showed me another way, and gave me the strength to leave, when things just went too far." Esme straightened up, and plunged back into her tale, speaking aloud for the benefit of the rest of the family, who were gathering on the porch and steps.

"Leaving the hospital was hard, going back to my life, it was hard to realize those great conversations, those evenings were over, but they were not just a dream. I got my parents to realize I just was not ready to be tied into a marriage - or they were afraid of what would happen at that point, they allowed me to continue in school, not Radcliff, but to get my teaching certificate - I squeezed out 5 years with my pupils -my only true joy in life. Then my father brought Mr. Charles Evenson to dinner."

She continued; Alice and Jasper stood at the pillar, arms just about each other's waists, listening.

"I was now past twenty, at the edge with my parents, held by rules and conventions I could not yet bear to break. I thought…" Esme paused and drew a great breath.

"I thought I was ready, that this was just the way it was, and he seemed caring enough. I was raised to believe romance was, almost sinful, at least to crave it... and love? Well that was for giving you children." Esme beamed at Carlisle, then turned her smile toward each of us; her children. '_Emmett, my first new son.'_

"And that wasn't quite the truth." Light laughter filled the room; Emmett and Rosalie having joined, listening from their seats on the glider by the window.

"Love. Love is more than just that, but it was not what I found. I was Mrs. Charles Evenson - Esme seemed to have been lost in the transition."

_I see the bruises, the marks, the sneers. "These human memories have not dimmed, the pain was cut, but the scars lingered."_

"Even though no one knew what went on behind closed doors, to the people around us we were just another respectable couple. My mother said that I must be willful, deserving of his wrath - I did not want to think how it might be for her. I prayed for a change, then Charles went off to France, to the war."

Carlisle held Esme, wondering what had brought out this reminiscence; _was it the possibility of a new family member, or was something else motivating his bride? Coming up on 70 years, he still felt the same as when he stood with the minister, awaiting_ her _entrance._ He glanced around as Esme continued.

"I waited out the war, gaining confidence each day - then Charles came back. A few months later he gave me the only gift I'd ever wanted from him, and one he didn't mean to give. A child to fill my heart and the courage to pick up and go - to save that little one. I figured I could leave to save the life of another if I didn't have the guts to save myself."

Rosalie and I locked eyes for a moment. "I said nothing to anyone. As soon as I realized what was happening, I took what I could carry, bought a ticket to Milwaukee and left while Charles was at work. In Chicago I changed trains and contacted someone on a chance, wondering if old friend from school would know where I could find a fill in teaching post. The fates smiled on us; when I arrived in Ashland, Kate knew of a position opening in a week and promised to keep my true past a secret. I was Mrs. Platt - to my history and English students at the high school. I said I'd lost my husband - in a way that was true, and I didn't worry about the summer or what I would do when the baby arrived. I figured 1921 was a good year to start in."

This was probably the first time Alice and Jasper were hearing Esme's whole story. They listened, intense concentration on their faces. "Just after the close of the term, I delivered my son. I was exhausted from 2 days of labor and the nurses only brought him to me occasionally. He was perfect, but tiny. I had him in his bassinet at my bedside and we both seemed to doze off in the afternoon sunlight." Esme's hands moved as if she were cradling her child. I could see she couldn't bear to say the next words aloud. I read her thoughts and carried on for her.

"_She woke with a start - he did not seem right, he was fighting for each breath, becoming blue. Scooping up the tiny bundle, she pulled the nurse cord with a frantic motion."_

Esme continued. "I felt lower than low as they bundled him off down the ward, to the nursery. I just knew. I just knew and when the head nurse and the chaplain came onto the ward, I finally began to sob. I could not remember what they said, they baptized him 'John' right away and then he passed without even crying. I only heard his cry the day he was born. Sunday come and gone Thursday. Against their advice I left the hospital the next morning. I could not bear to hear the other babies. I remember going to Bratley's and making arrangements for my little boy to be buried..." Esme paused, looking out over the large lawn.

"I felt the wind on my face, the sun and I just kept walking toward the lake; I wanted to have the wind blow all the pain from my childhood, my marriage, my baby - right out of me - right past me. I just remember walking, walking and then, after the pain, waking up and seeing Emmett - for a moment I thought I was in some kind of heaven - was that my son, full grown_?" _

_Esme remembered his face in that moment, surprise and shock and delight._

"Bella's gift must have seemed burdensome as she reviewed my human life via my mind. you had to see so much pain - those memories did not loose any punch in the transition. In the Ashland house, Emmett sat with me, absorbing, answering questions and preparing me for Carlisle. "

Not out of necessity, but out of a deeper need, I drew in a long breath, to cover the silent communion between myself and Esme, memories of her first few months, flying out.

_Bewilderment at first. The transformation took one pain of the heart - channeled it into a pain of the flesh and finally the echo of grief was all that remained. You heard all the pain on my mind, the fear at what I had endured as a wife and the fear that it would all be a sort of the same with Carlisle. The echo of that fear I carry occasionally to this day. I wanted to really be a wife to him, and yet it took me half a year to agree to his proposal. Emmett, you also filled the place in my heart where my son would have grown, I watch you with all the pride a mother can have., Then you came, Bella and I know you will find your heart one day too. I will support you on that day as you helped me._

Jasper was basking in the warmth of those emotions, Alice had to interject "OK, Mom I know you and Bella are thinking along the same lines, please fill the rest of us in?"

"Alice, I don't know how long you and Jasper were together, before you were, well ah, together, I just know you two came as a pair when you arrived. Emmett, my dear first new son and Rosalie; you and Emmett were in front of a minister as soon as you could manage. My dear husband had to wait for me, twice; once when we first met, and then for six months before I would marry him. I am so glad he possesses the patience of the saints he grew up with," Esme declared with a pause, before she could finish, Alice piped in.

"Now our Dear Bella is working her own heart at last. No grouching. This can work."

She gave a pointed glare to any that would hazard a gaze to her face.

Carlisle rose to his feet. "Bella, I'm going to change – then join me for a hunt."

This formal declaration always served notice that we needed to speak. I nodded and followed up, wanting to change as well.

Change. In so many ways.

**A/N**

**There, hope it's worth the wait. We're almost to the piano bench - and of course, the meadow. Reviews will get teased, and the next essay too, maybe Bella's paper. **

**Places, to avoid confusion, Columbus, Ohio - not exactly where they were, but it was the closest city of size to Esme's childhood home. Ashland, Wisconsin is where Carlisile moved after changing Emmett, more details to come!**

**People who press review are awesome! Readers are too, but there is a special spot in Valhalla for givers of the gift of critique! Off to write 14**

**Reb  
**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N Thank you to my patient readers. To those who press review - Thank You Double! **

**To my patient and quick Beta, Mel! High Fives! and heartfelt Thanks. **

So to recap

Edward is the cool new guy, son of the Chief of Police and Bella is the shy daughter of the reserved Cullen's...

**Chapter Fourteen**

Spring, when a young man's heart turns to…?

Hunting and Fishing – yes, manly pursuits. Mike Newton's dad actually said that when I dropped by after school to see about a part-time position. I'd start in two weeks. I'd worked for a few neighbors in Phoenix, nothing real formal- this would be my first official job, I-9 and W-2's. I felt like… well I felt older. Not so much wiser, just older. Maybe it was the weather here.

The days passed in a regular routine, my sling being forgotten as I met with Dr. Cullen, he said I was limber and healed quickly. I didn't mention Bella's special care. That's her Dad, ok maybe foster Dad, but still. I didn't want to break my happy bubble.

Happy, happy is new for me. I'd never been broody or sad, not the Emo-boy type, just quiet and solid and content. Renee had liked me like that. It was Phil who asked me what I did for just fun. I remembered the conversation we had just before he proposed. He told me my mother made him happy. Made him feel alive and he never wanted to lose that. How could I say no? And then he asked me what I did, what really made me happy. A lot of things make me smile. Renee was mostly one big happy sun, so damn bright it was hard to see past the crazy energy and enthusiasm she brought to most of her activities. I could just siphon off a little of the glow.

There was no sun to give that glow here, so why was I truly feeling happy? I was feeling so happy that even Charlie noticed. He knew me before, so he had a point to start; to measure and see the change. Thank fuck, the guys had no idea. That would be endless ribbing and there was something about the happy bubble that I did not want to share, to soil.

My one question was; did she see my bubble? Or would she be the one to burst it?

Saturday came around, rainy and temperate, I decided to fish with Charlie that morning.

He drove to one of his favorite spots, a little creek off the Sol Duk river. I began to appreciate why Charlie liked being out here. It was vibrant and full of life. It was quiet and no one asked anything of you here. I was lost in my head when Charlie decided to talk. This surprised me, but this was even more his home turf than his own house.

"You good?"

"Eh, Dad? Ah, yeah, school, I have that job starting at Newton's after the first, truck runs, yeah, yeah I'm good."

"Seemed so. Just all that? Well, Forks agrees with you."

Another long conversation with Dad. Maybe he's a stealth interrogator? _Just all that? No Dad, there's more than things; there's something, no someone, no._

These thoughts kept buzzing through my conscious mind. I wasn't going to go down that rabbit hole. She was just a nice girl. I was not going to catalog what I had observed. Nope, not going there.

Not now, anyway. 'Release the Kraken' from the Clash of the Titan's dialogue flashed thru my mind. At that moment, the skies decided to open their gates and attempt to drown anything in the way. We gathered up the gear in record time and entered the house sopping and dripping. After I changed, I came into the kitchen to see Charlie tending to the fish business, a few nice fillets sitting on the counter. I gathered up the bits for a marinade and we worked together in silence. He noticed what I was doing when I placed the covered bowl of marinating fish into the fridge.

"Hey, I got some great fry coating?"

"Oh, this will be good. I promise. I'll fry another time." I was in my pre-med mode, and Charlie's diet of fry this and fry that was a great prescription for a coronary. If the recipe I had Googled was as good as it sounded, I doubted he'd complain. He'd fixed some sandwiches before we left and they survived the deluge. We ate in silence. I was getting used to the quiet in this house. Charlie wasn't one to just put on the radio or flat screen for background noise, and I wasn't going to while he was here.

Charlie's cell ringing broke the silence. He stepped to the living room to take the call.

"You all right for the afternoon? I gotta go in for a bit. Some early hikers missed their check in," He sounded just a bit off, like there was more to the situation.

"Sure, sure Dad. I've meant to get over to the Dojo in Port Angeles. They have some afternoon classes and I don't want to get rusty."

"Good, drive, well, be careful."

"Yeah, will do. You too."

"Always am. Always am."

After cleaning up the kitchen I headed out for Port Angeles. I'd pulled the directions from the web and I'd found a decent radio station. The old radio, not original equipment but older than me, crackled and faded from time to time. This would be the one thing I'd change - something with a CD and a jack for my music was definitely on my list.

Birthday's just a few months away.

The Dojo was in a converted warehouse, near the docks. It was spacious, bare bones and raw, but it had decent mats and a good feel from the first impression. Kung Fu, Judo and Tae Kwon Do, along with some basic weapons classes were listed on the website. The closest Aikido was near Seattle. I could maybe go once a month. I'd come up with my own plan. I'd offer to teach.

I walked through the door, and nodded to another man who was entering an alcove across the room. He returned a moment later, in a Gi, with his Black Belt and his weapons case in his hand.

I gave a short bow in his direction. "Sensei?"

He stuck out his hand. "Sensei Dan Johnson, Judo and Kung Fu. Sensei Paul Stoddard handles Tae Kwon Do."

We shook hands and I brought my certificates out of the bag, setting them on the desk. We chatted for a moment about the schedule; I realized that their photos were on the website. He glanced at my certificates.

"Aikido, beautiful art. Hard to get a hold of you folks, slippery."

"Yes, that's the point."

"Frustrating, from a Judo standpoint, but fun. Care to join my class, it's intermediate and a few advanced. It will mix things up a bit."

This was better than I had expected. I grabbed my bag and came back out of the changing area with full gear, Hakima included. Sensei looked at me.

"Showing your full hand?"

I swallowed and reconsidered. "Maybe, perhaps Sensei has a white belt I could use?"

Sensei Dan smiled, "I think that would be wise. There are a few egos in this group; I think you can be a great antidote."

I changed and took the class as a new student. I knew some Judo within the Aikido and it became apparent that I was, as Sensei predicted, slippery. I felt the ire in a few members of the class. Aikido is a mutual concord; jonesing for a fight doesn't work. This level of competitive hostility was one of the reasons I stayed with Aikido. Plus the swords, yep they were definitely cool.

At the end of the class, Sensei introduced me, as a Don candidate in Aikido. I could hardly believe my ears. As the class dispersed, I stepped over to the desk.

"How?"

"I got a call about you from a friend in Seattle. Seems you left a very good impression with your Dojo in Phoenix. They figured you'd show up here first. Sensei Franklin in Seattle will oversee your prep and eventual testing. Think teaching a class would be good prep?

_Teach, teach Edward, wake up! He's offering you a class!_ "Yes, oh, Yes Sensei."

"Good, I have free evenings on Monday's at 6. I'll post it, we'll keep the cost to a minimum since you're not a Don yet and we can do the details later, okay? Want to stay for Tae kwon do?"

The rest of the afternoon passed in a blur. I went through the same routine with the Tae Kwon Do class, ending the day with the Sensei's doing a little weapon's kata after the last class. I was given a key and shown where the lights and other necessaries were located.

I offered to shut down and lock up for tonight.

In the quiet, after everyone was gone, I plugged my iPod into the stereo and ran through my aiki-taiso exercise and a favorite Jo routine. It was a little dark as I locked the front door. I could park in the instructor lot on Monday. I figured I'd get Ben and Tyler and maybe Mike to come, to give me some place to start. I was so deep in my plans that I did not notice a few of the students from the first class loitering near my car.

One, easy.

Two, three…okay. Not great, but okay.

But… four.

Shit.

There is a concept called "No Mind" where the brain takes auto-pilot on your body and you just move – on trained instinct. I didn't have my bag; I had left my things, including my weapons inside the Dojo. I had only my keys in one hand. I fisted my truck key, glad the door wasn't locked.

I began crossing the street. I looked at my truck, with the two students leaning on the bed, one against the front fender- where was the other one?

Behind me. Oh, good!

"You are no Sensei." Came from behind as an arm wound around my neck, the other reaching for my hands. Perfect.

At that moment I placed my hands onto his arm at my neck, holding it to my chest as I dropped to my knees, dropping forward at the waist to allow him to fly over me and into the other two, knocking into them with surprise. I stood to a pair of headlights and as screech of tires. The sweetest voice in the world was edged with titanium.

"What the fuck, Swan? You standing me up?"

What the fuck, indeed. Before I could even register what was happening, she had moved to glaring hard at the quartet. "There are more of him, you know. Usually we travel in packs. Armed Packs."

They stared at her briefly, glanced guiltily at me, bowed and fled.

Huh?

"You Ok? I mean, I just, I, I was..."

"No, I'm good, uh, thanks. Great timing. Oh, I wouldn't stand you up. Ever."

"Hungry?"

Food, yeah, food might help calm the sudden surge of wild energy that had started as soon as I heard her voice. "I could eat."

"Good, follow me, I know a place."

As she turned around and I started my truck I realized I would probably follow her without question. I looked at my phone and saw a text.

DINNER AT OFFICE. GOING TO BE LATE.

I left him a message saying I would eat with friends in Port Angeles. Texting and driving was more trouble than I wanted to handle today. Talking with Bella.

That, I could handle.

We traveled for a few minutes to a street with several choices. I parked behind her, a few doors down. We walked, and in the silence I reached out, lacing my fingers with hers. Still so cold, but it wasn't a warm evening. We climbed the steps to 'La Bella Italia'.

"Italian Okay?"

"Yeah – hey, was it just luck?"

Before I could get an answer, the hostess was bringing us to a table towards the center of the dining room. I watched Bella's face as the hostess moved to seat us there. Her eyes said no and her posture took on a pose, a strong something seemed to radiate around her.

"Oh a Booth, a booth would be better," and the hostess gave me a long look. She sat us in a high walled circular booth.

"Coke please." Bella looked toward me.

"Yeah, same. Thank You."

We studied the menu in silence. When the cokes arrived, Bella asked for the mushroom ravioli. That wasn't something I'd made, so I got it too.

"Copycat?"

"Me? No, it just sounded good; it's not something I've made myself."

There was a small candle on the table; I absentmindedly ran my fingers over the glass top, warming the tips as I looked at her. Her hair was loose and she was in that blue v-neck sweater I had liked before. She looked out, then at her hands on the table, then almost shyly over to me. I was pretty much staring at her, trying to figure out what had just happened.

"So, you cruise the industry-warehouse row often?"

"I was in town, it's… it's a short cut."

I started to rise. I wanted to leave, to pretend a girl had not rescued me, again. It was so backward and at the same time I was grateful and I didn't want to hurt her feelings. I wanted to figure her out. Something seemed to glisten, to sparkle in the candle light, and I just shifted in my seat.

"I have my secrets, so I guess you can too. But, why me? Am I just that lucky?"

"Edward."

Oh lordy, I loved to hear her say my name- and my dirty teen mind took over for a second. I'm screwed six ways to Sunday, so screwed.

"Edward. I was in town; I met Alice, Jasper and the rest for shopping and a movie."

"Okaay."

"It was just by chance I saw your truck. It's hard to miss and it was easy to see what was on their minds."

I gestured with my hands as I spoke. "Oh, so now you are the girl that so gets guys you can read their minds?"

Silence. Oh. Oh Shit. She knew what I had just thought. What? What, do I believe this?

More silence. I do.

Fuck.

"I… I can hear everyone in this room, apart from you. Edward, you are a quiet corner in a noisy, nasty world."

"How can I?"

"He's going to order lasagna with sausage, she's worried about his heart, she'll ask to share and she's getting antipasti salad with dressing on the side."

I listened to the couple across the room. I could just barely make out their order. Bella was dead on.

So that is why she was in the Cullen collection of misfit toys, as someone had cataloged the family.

"Wow, it's gotta be hard at school?"

"Hence the hoodies and the distance. I like to fly; at ten thousand feet I'm far enough up to find silence."

Ok, smart, strong, silent like a ninja and she flies planes. What does she find in me? Oh yeah, I'm her library corner. I'm quiet. I'm a quiet, suddenly accident and danger prone puppy. I felt two inches tall. I looked at her face, her eyes. There was no trace of pity; just a plea for understanding. She bit her bottom lip as the food arrived.

I was hungry, so I dove into the ravioli, finding it tasty. Out of the corner of my eye I watched her push hers around the plate, nibbling on just one square.

"Eyes bigger than your appetite?" I wanted to offer her a polite out, and I was still hungry after the classes and the, ah adventure on the street.

.

"Bella," I said between bites. "I agree, but I'm not up for tonight. I do like you; I want to figure this out."

"Tomorrow then? I know a place – your truck would be better suited to getting us there."

"Ok, time?"

"One, I'll meet you at your house." The waitress dropped off the folio as we spoke and before I could reach, Bella set a black card into the slot.

"Hey, I called you out on standing me up, the least I can do is pay. You get the next one."

I had heard of the black card, I'd never seen one. "Bella, really what can you see in me?"

"I see everything. I like what I see, Edward." She smiled, "Please walk me to my car? Tomorrow, at one."

My fingers found hers again as we returned to the cars in silence. I watched her pull away and the only thought in my head.

_I should have kissed her._

**A/N As always, those who press review will be rewarded!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Shush the inner Tomboy; cue the pop love songs…

'Dinner' with my Dad, okay, a hunt with Carlisle; never a bad thing to do - sort of a quiet, reflective habit. He was the one who taught me to hunt, and I would only hunt with him for a long, long time, really until I could accomplish it very neatly on my own. I had always tried to hide the evidence of my tomboy pursuits from my mother and I continued the habit with Esme. It dawned on me quickly that the fresh clothes, always out in my room, with a basin of water; were laid out by my mother in this new, strange world. Esme understood I would not even care to cross to the bathroom, entering the house by my bedroom window; a habit I still favored when I hunted alone.

We did not speak much on the way out; his quiet presence in the travel enough of a balm. The discussion on the way home was more animated. Carlisle opened the dialogue.

"He's not so young, is he?"

"Seventeen, I suppose. That is young to me."

"You were out at 16 you said, so that would seem young by your measure, young in this time."

"He's not though, he's, he's…"

"Bella, I know. I remember that edge of forever."

I glanced over to see his face, shining and torn with a memory that looked equal measure sweet and sad.

"I wasn't brave in love, dear one. I ran the first time my heart was touched. It is part of the reason I cannot believe the Almighty has cast us aside. I received another opportunity."

"I can't fathom leaving or even how I could. I will not do anything to place the family in jeopardy." A sudden realization chilled my core. _If I or he learns the truth, what chance…_

"Bella, no one in our family will betray you, but you know why I left Esme the first time, not just her youth or innocence, but the rules."

"You said you would never - after Rose."

"I will seek no one else out Bella. I cannot." He took my hand in a kindly grasp. "You will have to ask yourself, first. You are well to let him decide if it should come to that, but you must be prepared to do whatever you must." _The Volturi will not hesitate; they will act if they feel they must._

"I understand Carlisle. Is it selfish to say I would… I would wish him with me always?"

"No, but I do think you have it ingrained into your fiber that he has to do the asking."

"Ah, you do know me well."

We left things there as we returned home.

I tried not to be too different – I still wore hooded items when I could, but much more, form fitting thanks to Alice.

I loitered until the last moment to hear him play each afternoon.

I longed for a real kiss, and it left me feeling like a younger, pre-sparkly version of myself, like someone with a hopeful heart.

I wanted to steal another kiss.

I waited for a chance.

Saturday, Alice and Emmett had convinced me to go shopping with all of them for Esme, because her birthday was coming right up. I insisted on driving myself, Emmett in the Porsche with Alice was a bit much; they ended up in the Jeep. Alice talked me into 3 new outfits, then she wanted to drag Em off somewhere for something for Rose and then see a movie before returning home. I said I'd head to the theatre and get the tickets.

I don't know how I ended up by the warehouse area; I was over thinking things, and the rest of my mind was on autopilot; but when I heard the thoughts, I knew exactly who they were waiting for – no one else had a truck like Edward's

It was a bit of a shock to see him send his one attacker flying, from a chokehold on him, suddenly turning him into a missile aimed at his two compatriots. The fourth froze in my headlights. I didn't care about my speed as I got out and yelled "Swan." I let 'it' out with all the menace I could lace into my voice. It was the first time that the stuff in me, of nightmares, came out and made me smile.

He came with me to dinner. I would choke down a small herd of cattle to do that again, ravioli wasn't too bad in either direction. He knows my gift and he agreed to talk tomorrow. For once, I was glad to be under the "Cullen Collection banner." _Oh, if you only realized how true that is._ Now I just need to clear the house for a bit.

Thankfully, that would not be a problem. The rest of the family had decided to head north for an extended hunt. I sent Edward a text:

**1 AT YOUR HOUSE OK?**

Moments later:

**OK. THX 4 TONIGHT. SWEET DREAMS**

Oh, oh Edward, I so wish I could dream. I would dream of you, if I could. I wandered through the deserted house. Rose's piano was illuminated by a rare moonbeam.

I knew where to start.

Dawn crept in too slowly, I even contemplated spending an hour at church, and perhaps a good sermon would calm my nerves. I settled for listening, from my car. The sound of a children's chorus floated on the breeze.

Children of the Heavenly Father

Safely in His Bosom Gather

Nestling Bird or Star in Heaven

Such a Refuge n'ere was given

(Children of the Heavenly Father; Words: Karolina Sandell-Berg, 1858. Music: Swedish melody)

I was relieved to hear soft and comforting words from the pulpit. I already had too many fire and brimstone missives locked into my brain. I liked this speaker. "Grace is a gift, and the best way to acknowledge it is to accept it"

"_Sure, sure._" I wasn't sure I was mumbling or thinking as the bells tolled eleven.

I drove over to the market, filling a basket from a memory of a picnic under the wing of my first plane. I'd find what else I'd need at the house.

Finally, I could leave my car and run over to Edward's - such a funny bit of slang, 'run over' and I smiled to myself, wondering if we had coined the phrase as a pun. _Just thinking about getting close to him has me making jokes…_

I barely had to rap at the glass and the door flew open. Such a glorious sight, just jeans and a tight tee shirt topped by a plaid button up with the sleeves rolled up, what had Alice called his hair? Oh yeah, good thing I can't blush –'_fuckme' _that was the word.

"Hey."

"You are right on time, Miss Cullen." Even his eyes sparkled.

"Yeah, I caught a ride." I fought the urge to bite my lip. "Ready?"

Edward's smile had a touch of snark to it. "Your chariot awaits, mademoiselle."

The ride up to my house was pleasant, if slow. He apologized for the scratchy sounds coming from his speakers; I told him I didn't mind. It was the longest ride from Forks to our property I had ever experienced.

It was the closest to flying I could ever recall. The euphoria that sang in my limbs erased any small sane hope I had harbored. His scent did not rule over me now, it lifted me. I knew now what my family had realized much earlier.

There would never be another for me. I would do anything.

Anything.

I directed him to the nearly obscure road that led off the highway and the gears groaned a bit before we caught sight of Esme's masterwork. The chrome and glass came into view as we rounded the last group of pines. Edward's breath caught a bit as he spied the house for the first time.

"Whoa, that is a lot of house."

"Mom loves to design, and this lot really inspired her."

"Is this what you wanted to show me?"

"Oh, there is something inside, but not what I meant earlier." I smiled and swallowed, a very human gesture, very expected of a nervous girl. I guess I was that girl.

Edward pulled out all the gentleman training he had, opening the door of the truck for me, extending his hand to me as I got out of the cab and walking ahead of me to open the front door. I watched his eyes as he looked into the great room.

"A, uh, ah Grand Piano?" The green sparkled like Christmas lights in his face.

"Yeah, Rosalie is the piano player and I thought…"

"How did you know?" He looked puzzled for a second. "I don't care. May I?'

I raised my hand. "Please."

He grabbed my hand and led me toward the instrument.

The wonderful notes of Clair de Lune sprang forth as soon as we were seated on the bench. I listened as a number of wonderful bars washed over me. After a few moments, I stood and moved to stand behind him, resting my fingers on his shoulders. That touch encouraged him further into his music. I could have stood there all day. He slowed his pace, brining the piece to a close. Edward placed his hand on mine, sliding his fingers slowly along my wrist and pulled me down to sit opposite him. Our noses touched and a smile spread from his lips to his eyes.

"Thank you for this; for showing this to me."

"I, uh, I'm glad you like it."

"Come, come to prom with me?"


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16 Alert! Not Beta Approved**

**A/N Sorry this is not Beta approved, I'm a little concerned, Dear Beta Mel is AWOL, and I am hoping for a simple computer issue!**

**It's been a while since I posted, and I have a surprise for my reviewers - see you on the flipside, and as always, these characters are the property of Stephenie Meyer's . The other stuff is me, just inviting them out for a play date!**

**Happy Early Thanksgiving to all!**

From a very hard cold exterior, soft, warm (Warning: filing may be hot, take caution to avoid a burn) interior point of view

"Come, come to prom with me"

_Yes. _

Yes I was not hallucinating – he was sitting with me, our feet on opposite sides of the piano bench, face to face, noses touching, and now foreheads. Oh, his hands had left the piano and were holding the tops of my arms, so warm. I leaned in against his chest, drawing a deep breath in through my nose, his scent enveloping everything. I swallowed against the burn. _I would ignore it. It did not matter. _I slid my cheek and body around so I was against his chest and his arms wound around me. My hands slid along the front edges of his shirt, fingering the buttons and buttonholes.

Here is perfect, here is where I can hear and feel each heartbeat. I look up into those bright green eyes. They crinkle with anticipation, of my answer, his lips are in a slight smile, closed, waiting.

Just like that, my human side sits on my monster. Quelling it for a moment's respite.

Against my better judgment, which I will be sending on a long deserved vacation, I utter one word.

"Yes"

In his body I can fell what he is about to do and I call on every ounce of control I can find in my suddenly fuzzy brain. One portion is still on alert enough to close my teeth firmly against the tide of venom that reminds me of my precarious perch. I prefer the fuzzy part of my brain that has connected to my heart. It's warm, just as warm as his lips that are brushing mine. Silky soft, with a hint of cinnamon and leather and him; his tongue brushes my lips, they part just enough so he nibbles the lower one, ever so slightly and the sensations whisper through me, sending tingles through my limbs and to my very core, lighting me up from the inside out. I softly tug him towards me; draw in a deep breath with my nose again. I am at the edge of madness, wanting so much to.

Stop. I shudder slightly, partially from the realization of how on the edge I rest and partially from breaking the kiss. "Yes" I repeat.

"Good, so very, very good." His smile ignites my brain.

"I and I am so very, very glad you like the piano." I listen as he chuckles lightly. "This isn't what I wanted to show you today."

"No?" He raises his eyebrows just so.

I stand and step away from the bench. "Come on Mr. Swan, there are more adventures afoot "

He swivels around the bench comes to his feet and smirks at me. "Well, why didn't you say so Miss Cullen? Lead on!"

Our fingers entwine and I lead him to the kitchen, where the basket sits on the pristine counter. He lets out a low whistle as his eyes take in the room. Alice and Esme are the main culprits here, Esme remembers what one needs to cook and Alice likes to shop for fine design and equipment. I'm guessing they have done an excellent job by the appreciative look on his face.

"What? A guy's gotta eat and I'd rather eat things that taste good. I like to cook; well I'd like to cook even more with a kitchen like this. An AGA for chrissakes."

I never realized that bright blue thing in the kitchen would get him as excited at the piano, almost. "Wow, maybe I should have brought you in here first?"

"'Unckin Disneyland here. You hiding a gigantic flat screen and all the games too?"

"No, they are in the room behind the kitchen, that's Emmett's and Jasper's domain."

"Where's yours?"

"Oh, here and there…another time. Our adventure waits!" Some day I'll show him the hanger, and maybe if I'm very brave I'll take him upstairs. Not today, today is about the meadow. Today is about truth, maybe. And maybe I should be a big girl and not get my hopes up.

We return to the truck and I direct him to drive on the roughly cleared 'road' up past the back of the house and around onto the northern edge of our lands. I'd prepped a turn around space where we park. It's about a half mile to the spot. I'd set it up so it was at least plausible I had just wandered up to it, I hoped it was, was, anyway.

He hopped out of the truck quickly after we stopped. He'd grabbed the basket and opened my door. I hesitated as I swiveled around.

"It doesn't matter." He rolled his eyes a bit and smiled. " I really don't care and it doesn't matter."

"What?" burbled out of my mouth as my jaw dropped a bit.

"I don't care if you are mafia fugitives or spies or fucking space aliens.."

"You don't care."

"No, but I'd like to know. I'd like to know you trust me to know." He placed his hand above me on the top edge of the cab as he leaned in just a bit.

_If I told you I'd have to kill you_, ran through my brain as another part of it was evilly cackling. "You're very smart, very smart you know."

"So?'

"I, I like your theories. Do you have any more?" Oh God I hope he's close. I can't say it. It would sign both our death warrants. But if he knows…that is a grey area, a cloudbank and I can work; I can so work with a cloudbank.

"I know" He hesitates, swallows and continues, "I know what you are and I don't care."

"Say it."

He let out a long breath as he spoke, "You are not going to hurt me."

"Say it, out loud."

"Vampire." It comes out in a hush, almost a whisper or a kiss. He looks right into my eyes.

I hazard a quick glance at the sky; the clouds are parting here and there, on the edge of a real break in the clouds. I grab his hand as I slip from the truck. "Come with me, you have to understand." I try to keep my tug gentle as I head up the trail. It's time to show him the meadow. It's time for a walk in the sun. Time to have him meet my other side.

The clouds continued to clear; I knew the sun would be filling the clearing, the early spring flowers springing to life on the breeze. We quickly arrived at the edge of the tree line; he kept up with my more than human pace better than expected.

I became vaguely aware of the sun on our heads, clear, real and warm. We slowly entered the clearing through the tall pines. The soft breeze had the scent of salt from the ocean and picked up wildflowers as it came across our path. I was aware I was walking with him. My eyes stayed forward as we made our way toward the middle. Then, not sure if it was by request or command, my eyes closed. All my senses heightened. The feeling of grass, shushing under my feet; the whispers of the wind and chirping of birds from the trees, the thump, thump of a heartbeat in my ears and my fingers found the other hand, our fingers entwining.

We faced each other, still not looking, eyes lost in the black velvet of our own lids. I was awash in a sense of deja vu, not seeing this from Alice either. I drew in a deep breath.

"It's true. I can accept it."

"Shh" I leaned in and brought my lips close to his. Sandalwood and cinnamon, leather and …him, that was all I would ever need. This time I took the chance and sucked his bottom lip slightly. Dear God, it was warm perfection.

Time to break the spell, or send him down the rabbit hole.

"Edward, look at me." I dropped his hands and stepped back into the meadow, in the warm spring sun.

"Ahhh"

**A/N Part the second - so, the more reviews, the bigger the tease. 17 is done, just waiting to be beta approved! Good or Bad, let me know if I'm even in the same continent as the right track. Press review and make my day!**


	17. Chapter 17

**THE Muses that Inspired Stepehenie Meyers with these Characters...I'm just mixing things up a bit, and the plot is my invention, so I cannot be under the exact same muses - right?**

**Author's Note:**

**There is a little bit of intentional confusion at the beginning of each chapter - In order for you, dear reader to guess who's point of view we will be exploring.**

**Also, Happy 2011 - I'll be becoming a bit of a vagabond for the next few months, both good and bad points, but it should give me time for writing.**

**More on the flip-side!**

**Chapter 17**

_**From the newest resident of the Hundred Acre Woods**_

"Ahh." I hoped it was a sound of perfection. One side of me was sure I was going to see Mothra, Tigger and the Cheshire cat; the better side of me was beyond dazzled. Damn. I knew Bella was beautiful; she could hide in a hoodie and sweats and she would still be more beautiful than any girl I have ever seen. Period. What I saw before me was more than I could have envisioned in my wildest dreams. Bella glittered like she was cloaked in diamonds, glowing from the inside out. She was light and grace as she stepped into the center of the clearing.

"Like diamonds. You are a living diamond."

"Living, Edward? Living. I am not alive."

What was she saying? The idea she was not alive was simply impossible. She was fucking life, damn it. She was my life.

She

Was

My

Life.

That was it.

I wasn't just a 17-year-old guy who was just used to taking care of my mom. I wasn't a guy who fools around on the piano or with Aikido or schemes to figure out how to get through enough schooling to be a doctor.

I felt like a

man.

A Man in Love.

If by Love, I mean the idea of being separated caused a physical pain. If it means being ready to take a bullet, to want to provide for her, to forsake all others, then damn. Mark me taken; hire the fat lady to sing.

Whaat? Deep breath; center yourself. Think, Edward, Think!

I am so…not going there; I want to be with her. I can think in a nanosecond all the things I would love to do with her, to her, make her say my name. My mind may be an old soul but, a big hormonal chunk is still very active! Thank fuck she can't read my mind; some things are pretty raw and I wouldn't want it taken out of context.

"Bella, you, you take my breath away."

"Seriously?"

"You can't see yourself clearly, you can't see you like I do."

"See me, Edward?" The tone of her voice changed, almost to a challenge and she vanished from my sight, only to have me feel her cool fingers snap lightly onto my face, covering my eyes and blocking the sunshine.

"Did you see me coming?' She breathed in my ear and before I could respond she had vaporized from my back. A crack of a nearby tree limb caught my eye and I glanced over to see her holding a branch as thick as I am over her head. I didn't even blink.

"You can't catch me."

In a flash she was beside me, then … ungh! I was in a fireman's carry as she whisked to the other side of the meadow and onto an outcropping of rocks. Setting me down on the top, she continued. "You can't elude me."

"Bella."

"Do you get it now?

Do.

You.

Understand?"

"Bella."

"What?" She spat it in almost a pleading manner. She stood over where I sat; where she put me.

"Listen, okay? Me; mortal. You; not so much okay!" I threw my hands up. "So what? Can you play the piano?"

"What?"

"CAN YOU PLAY THE PIANO?"

Her face looked a little blank, a little hurt. God, I did not want that in her eyes.

"Bella, I don't choose to care about what I can't change." I grabbed her hands. "I'm not afraid of you."

"You should be."

I hesitated, she could leave me on the rock pile, and I wasn't so sure about getting down easily on my own. Time to go for it – _man up Swan_. I lowered my tone and volume, "You don't have to touch me to break me."

She looked right into my eyes, speaking softly. "What do you mean?"

"You could leave. Not just leave me here, now, but leave."

I could feel the pounding of my heart; it wasn't slowing down much as I waited for her response.

She looked into my eyes. Understanding softened her features. She looked away.

"I, We…we are different." Bella turned her face back to mine. "We choose to embrace what little humanity we have left. We leave humans be. We call ourselves vegetarians."

It was my turn to be confused. "Vegetarian? Uh V-8?"

She smiled a real relaxed smile. "Really? Swan, are you asking me what my 'special diet' consists of?"

"I guess so. I'm hoping it's not…?"

"We hunt animals. We've found life amongst you...humans, to be much easier. Some are, ah, more fulfilling than others. But we have, for the most part, been abstainers for over 50 years, some longer."

I pondered that for a moment. '_50 years; some longer'._ "Good. I hate V-8. Ah, I know a guy should never ask this, but how old are you, Bella?"

"I'm, I'm – I was 19 on my last real birthday." She came around and sat next to me.

"How long have you been 19?"

"Hmm, long enough. I'm fonder of 17 actually."

"I'm 17, currently. I'll be 18 in June."

"Nice time for a birthday."

"You?"

"September."

"That's much better; school is in, easier for friends to celebrate, hang out."

"I'm not much for Birthdays, I haven't celebrated in …"

I grabbed Bella's hand. "I don't care." I took a deep breath, _find your center, breathe, and move from your center. In for a penny, in for a pound. Right?_ I found my voice again. "Bella, do you feel, do you feel this connection?" Her eyes grew bright and I was sure if there were a way for her to blush, she'd be rose red in a heartbeat.

"Feeling Brave? Like Heights?" Her eyes twinkled for a moment and she pulled me to my feet and pulled me up into a piggyback hold. "Hang on, Swan. Watch where you put those hands."

In a flash we were, or as I was mere baggage 'she was' would be more apt, clambering up one of the gigantic spruce trees that ringed the clearing. When she stopped, I gingerly climbed off and stood alone on a branch. The wind whipped a bit at this height. I did not feel fear. I felt alive, more than I ever had. I looked over into Bella's face as I wrapped one arm around a branch just below my shoulder height. I wrapped the other arm around Bella. I looked into her face, her eyes aglow with the surprise knowledge that I liked it up here, and she wanted more. I leaned into her as she did the same. Our gravity being for each other, damn the planet anyway. It wasn't gentle, tentative kissing. It was deeper and wilder and much more satisfying. There was a dark level there; of secrets, promises and things to come.

"Yes, yes, Edward. I feel it. I can't leave either." Her voice was breathless as our foreheads leaned against each other. I straightened up a bit and she came to rest her cheek against my chest.

"Miss Cullen, I do think there is something I need to do?"

"Anything," She mumbled it into my chest with her eyes closed.

"Introduce me to your father. Properly."

She chuckled a bit as she gazed up at me. "Let's get on more even ground, and I can introduce you to the whole family. Some of them have been dying to meet you."

I was really glad she could not read my thoughts as we descended to the meadow floor. _Oh sure, dying to meet me. I'm the one to worry._

We returned to the spot where I'd dropped the basket. The sun was still fairly high when we took to the middle of the clearing, setting out the blanket. Bella had packed an assortment of food, enough for several teens: fried chicken, cookies, apples, bananas, potato chips and lemonade. She told me it was one thing she remembered from her, as she put it, 'short, not terribly wild', youth, her favorite picnic lunch. We spent the next few hours there on the blanket. We sat and talked about, of all things, history. Hearing some of my favorite parts of the past 70 years – from her feminine perspective was eye opening to say the least. She admitted to attaching songs to various "historical" memories. She asked for my story, and I felt pretty inadequate describing my years with my mom, keeping the house accounts 'afloat' since I was nine and one afternoon I came home to a dark house. I tried to make light of all I had ended up taking on at that age, how sneaking into practice rooms, empty classrooms and the occasional church basement to find pianos to play had led to my discovery and working with a few teachers here and there. Renee didn't realize the half of it, all the yard and clean up work I had traded for lessons over the years. I told her how a bad date had led my mom to meeting my first Sensei in Aikido, a woman actually who had tossed out her 'lout' as she had characterized him.

Bella worked on my back and shoulders again, her fingers draining any lingering effects away and replacing it with the most exquisite sensations. After lunch, we laid next to each other on the blanket, watching the clouds roll in, our fingers intertwined.

Bella began to recall what she could of her not so wild youth; school, favorite books and then seeing airplanes when the occasional pilot flew over.

"I was five when flight was achieved." She looked at me, expecting something or me to run off. I just smiled and waited her out. She explained about the "Great War" and the influenza that almost took her brother's lives, but they had returned from the Army, never having left the U.S. They talked about the pilots they had met. Bella confessed she had traded half of that picnic lunch for a plane ride when she was almost 15, sneaking off for lessons from the barnstormers whenever they came to town and at 16, talking her way into a flying circus. Back then she was down to just one dress, jodphers, a heavy jacket and sweaters – one suitcase for over 3 years….

I caught her in the sunshine, more than once, humming or singing something so softly I could not quite make it out, preferring to observe her, the sparkles from her skin sprinkling rays of color on my hand or the blanket. The hundred-acre wood never saw such beauty.

As the shadows grew longer I began to gather our things into the basket and tried to surprise her with a kiss while her eyes were closed. I though I had her fooled and then she explained she could smell the sandalwood and leather that made my presence unique to her. She didn't explain until we were back in the truck, to her credit. It still made me smile nonetheless.

The sun was just beginning to set as we pulled back into her house. Emmett and Jasper were conspicuous in their presence on the front porch. The only thing missing was someone cleaning a shotgun. I felt their eyes on my back as I helped Bella from the cab and placed my hand at the small of her back as we climbed the steps and entered the foyer. This time I was met with soft strains of a Brahms lullaby. Rosalie was at the piano, her hair softly glowing from the light over the score, but she played from memory; her eyes closed as we came into the room. Before I could even say hello, I felt a smaller set of cool arms wrap around my waist.

"Bella! Bell-lah, what have you brought home?" The bright songlike voice of Alice was sent in the direction of Bella, who had been separated from my touch by this Prada pixie.

"Alice."

"Edward, it's so nice to have you here!" She was bouncing. Thank fuck she couldn't drink caffeine or a Red Bull, we'd probably lose a few feet from the mountaintops.

"Glad to be here, Alice."

"Alice, don't…" Esme suddenly stopped, looking at Bella who gave her a tiny headshake; it looked to be a private language._Duh Swan? Mother –daughter and telepath..._

Esme with Carlisle had continued into the room, and Dr. Cullen put out his hand to me.

"Dr. Cullen."

"Edward. Son, what brings you here tonight?" He asked as if he knew, he was throwing me a bone in front of his sons, who had now taken up positions by the two entrances to the room.

"Sir," I swallowed, realizing it was just regular nerves, not _I'm about to be the main course_ variety. "I've asked Bella to come to the prom with me."

Before another thing could happen – an ear-shattering squeal threatened to destroy the chandelier and the grand that sat beneath it. The keys would be fine because as soon as that died down, Rosalie slammed the cover shut, causing the instrument to rattle and I flinched at the sound. Her speech was not improving the acoustic attack.

"Fine, fine and dandy. Don't pretend that this is FINE. This can have grave consequences, Carlisle…."

"I am not about to tell anyone anything."

"There will be repercussions for all of us if …."

"If what Rose?" Emmett looked over at his? Whatever they were.

"Rose!" Carlisle and Esme spoke in a way together that made me think this was not unordinary.

"If I became the meal." I finished to see seven sets of golden eyes bore down on me.

_Shit!_

Rosalie was not to be deterred. She came right up to me and glared. "Swan, you better be tight lipped, our lives depend on that."

_Huh? Lives? Immortal, right_?

Jasper looked at me, giving the distinct impression that I was a specimen on a lab slide, prepped and ready for grilling by microscope. A flash of intensity was replaced by a gentler expression before he spoke. "Rosalie, he's not holdin' a hard bone in his body, he's a mite confused. Settle yourself." His accent surprised me.

Rosalie was now in my face, "He needs to know!" Speaking to the others, as if I were no more than a pane of glass, she moved to poke me in the chest with her finger when Carlisle came behind her and touched her on the shoulder.

"Here now, Rose. I think you'd better come with me, Edward. I am sure you have questions."

_Questions?-no stinkin' question, It's a final exam…_ I just nodded, from somewhere calm settled over me. It felt a little foreign, but I was grateful for it. Rosalie's eyes went wide before she spoke.

"Jasper, really?"

"Yes Rose." Emmett rubbed her arm as he leaned in to murmur something else in her ear, leading to a softening of her stance and a sigh escape from her lips as they turned up lightly in a small smile. _Have to distract her much? Emmett…_

Alice came to stand beside Jasper. She was another mystery, her face suddenly so far away, but this would wait for another visit, I'm sure it could. It damn well had to.

Bella took my hand with a slight tug. "Carlisle's study is upstairs." I followed, realizing she was really holding my hand tightly. It was sending my body the most incredible energy –ki- from Aikido, if you will; my senses seemed to have magnified tenfold. I felt the carpet on each stair tread. I noticed the intricate carvings of an ancient cross on the wall, the odd period portraits and the colored silk? Tassels? Worked into a large wall piece that hung on the first landing as we turned to enter, passing via a heavy carved door that would have looked fine on an ancient ship, something like the Cutty Sark. _Cutty Sark? That is not in the Hundred Acre wood. Maybe one from Pirates of the Caribbean? Yeah. I think I now believe in Santa again._

Bella and I sat in a pair of deep brown leather club chairs across from Carlisle's desk. It was a generous slab of some old wood, more like a table with some sleek file things that fit underneath. He did not sit in the chair on the other side of the desk; he sat on the front edge. Behind him was a wall with a few paintings, a lot of framed certificates and a few photographs, from sepia and black and white to modern colored and one that looked like that Andy Warhol style with the color blocks. I realized it was Esme, laughing. Carlisle caught me looking.

"It's real Edward. Esme worked on a renovation for Andy, and he did the artwork as a study for his Marilyn Monroe piece.

I didn't even realize my jaw was hanging open, but I felt it snap shut. My teeth seemed to be bouncing in my head. Bella gave my hand a little squeeze. _Center, center, center. Breathe. _I glanced around the rest of the room. The other wall had several thin windows, scattered at various spots. Tiny shelves in them held colored objects, old glass bottles, I realized. The rest of the walls were shelves, books and odd rocks, bits of statues, old and new boxes and a sleek sound system. It felt _homey_. It was nice to sit in here. I felt the other calm retreat a bit and was able to replace it with my own. I looked back to Carlisle as his voice caught my attention.

"Edward, I'm not blessed with Bella's gift. You'll have to speak up if you don't fully understand. This is important for you and Bella."

I could only nod. _In for a penny…_

**So, there it is, our boys are pretty protective of their little sister. Good thing. Storms a brewin' and they haven't begun to search the horizon...yet**

**Make my new year and please review or comment! Thanks To all the Readers and Authors!**

**Reb (Rebadams7)**


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

**_A/N: No, I did not fall off the face of the earth - just way far south, to Dallas..Seriously I did not get this chapter via my Beta - the gaffs are all mine!_**

**_Happy Memorial Day - thank a service member or a veteran if you get the chance today. WASP's from WWII are Veterans too! - and now on with the show!_**

**OF a Father/Daughter sort of view…**

I was so glad to be in the safety of Carlisle's study. Whatever house we called home, Carlisle's study was my other sanctuary besides my room. Hell, it had been my room while we chose a new town after Jasper and Alice joined the club. Moving me out of all things…. The scent of the leather chairs, the old masters and the snapshots, the bits of our lives and the books, always the books to comfort; from my earliest days with the family, this room was my first home. I felt I could tell Edward anything while we were here and it would be fine, it would be safe.

Jasper lingered in the doorway, sending our feelings under a blanket of calm. "Jazz, I think we are ok here. Maybe Rose?"

"Em's got her covered. Told her they'd be on to prom as well, have her get some 'tin slinky I druthers." His drawl seeped into his speech much more often in the house and I watched Edward's face for a reaction.

"Jasper?" Edward and Carlisle spoke in unison.

"Yes shur."

Carlisle merely nodded and he slipped off, closing the door softly. I turned my gaze from Edward over to the man who had become my father on a cloudy day in August, 1926 _eighty four, almost eighty five years, finally a chapter completed._ I idly wondered if he's about to explain I'd been passed over, turned into the little sister and not the bride I had been envisioned as.

Edward looked to Carlisle "Is he, ah did he come from?"

"Jasper is from Texas, his full tale is his to share as he may." Carlisle gazed around the room for a moment to gather his thoughts. A vampire moment, because in less time than it took Edward to exhale, he began to tell his tale.

"Bella, you can fill in whatever else you think is absolutely necessary." I merely nodded for Edward's benefit as he continued. "I'm the son of a preacher, born in England, around 1540 or so. In the autumn of 1564, my father, too ill to lead a raid against the devil in our section of London, tasked me. I was an only child, my mother dying before I could remember her. I did not hold all the superstitions of my father, so I boldly led our little armed band into the street. I learned that faith in what you cannot always see, but can believe and feel is important. Waving our torches before us, we chased a few beings out of an abandoned structure; one lunged at me and caught the side of my neck. I was trampled by the mob and I rolled off to the side of the road as the burning in my neck spread all over me."

"I drug myself out of the street and hid in a cellar, covered in trash and pig trough bits to hide my scent from any other creatures. My sire must have been overly weak or foolish, or what I truly believe, set upon by others in the coven and burned to cover their escape. I watched it for a bit, I would never forget the cloying sweet smoke of its pyre. I burned in transition, in the cellar for 3 days, thinking death would come and I would enter into paradise – or damnation. When the burning passed, a beam of sunlight caught me as I shook off the refuse. I saw the sparkle in my skin and I waited to travel till nightfall. I was bedeviled by a burning thirst, and as I watched the citizenry pass the window, it was all I could do not to leap through the bars and grab the first person I found."

"That night, I left the basement and made my way to the church to pray, only to learn of my memorial being planned, that I was considered consumed by the demons. I'd wished I had been. The thirst did not abate and I tried to place myself in harms way, eventually walking to Dover and off the cliff. Thus I learned I did not sleep nor did I perish. In fact I could not drown or freeze. In agony of my thirst and my condition, not wishing to imperil another, I wandered into the wilds of northern England."

"I grew weak and I feared my resolve not to give into the thirst would fall. I kept away from people. One night I caught sight of a heard of deer." He paused for the first time in his recitation, drawing in a long breath, seeming to consider how best to continue. When I came back to myself, I found I had felled and fed from a number of the deer. I gave thanks to the Lord that there was a way to survive. With my strength and sight, my concentration and time, I decided to make my way to Italy and on to France to study and learn of my new 'kind' I had been under pressure to follow my father into ministry, I had always had a curiosity and desire to study medicine, so I did. In my travels I found I was the only vampire in Europe to abstain from the standard diet. In time, I was presented to the Volturi, sort of our 'Royal Family' in Italy. After my studies in Montpellier I came to the new world in time to see the Revolution. I continued to study and practice medicine and surgery across the United States and Canada. Before the Great War, in the summer of 1911, what we now call World War 1; I met and treated a young lady by the name of Esme. My heart was Esme Platt, of Ohio. After all those years, she was the light of my world. I was petrified of harming her, so I found a position far away, in Chicago. In my time in the new world, I had met one other coven of vegetarians, in Alaska. Sisters, Irina, Katrina and Tanya; and I sometimes traveled to Alaska to hunt the wilds with them. It was there, that I found Emmett, near death after a bear attack, in 1917, and I brought him to their encampment. I had been without a companion of any sort, and something about him; I could not let him die and I could not save him with my medical skills, so I changed him. We spent the next year in the wilds of Alaska first, then slowly worked our way back to civilization, with a post I found in the northernmost reaches of Wisconsin. I worked and aided with the Spanish Influenza, returning to Chicago and keeping my post in Ashland as well. In the spring of twenty-one, I was at the rear of the hospital when the town driver – for ambulance as it was then, and the local mortician pulled into our entry. It's a snowy town so they drove right into the building. Clarence was not a sharp tack, and was also fond of a pint or two, day or night. He was barely able to stand, so I assisted him with the removal of the two cots in his lorry. One was gone of a fever, a young woman and the other was mangled and still wore a hospital band. I realized that one was my Esme, and she was nearly gone. I convinced Clarence that he had found only one, and hurried with Esme to my home, where I did what I had to. Emmett watched over her as I went back and arranged to have Mrs. Evenson buried with her son, after I learned of all that had transpired at Ashland while I had been in Chicago. Esme's story is hers to tell, I'll leave the details to her sensibilities. Emmett called her Mom as soon as she awoke from her transformation. We remained in the wilds of Canada and Alaska for the next few years.

We were back in the states, in 1926, in Upstate New York when we saw Bella's crash one Sunday afternoon. It was a cloudy day and Esme and I had taken a drive into the country to look for some land. Instead I found a daughter, and a talented one at that. She never hid her skill after she realized what she could hear. Well, to our surprise, Emmett found in Bella, his little sister. We brought Bella to Alaska for that winter and then we returned to the states in 1928. We lived as a family, moving every few years or so. In late 1931 I was hired by the Eastman family to join their new hospital in Rochester, New York. In the spring of 1932, Esme and Emmett brought Rosalie home to us that April. That spring I learned just how much of a personal constitution is fixed at the point of change."

He had barely drawn breath through this tale, just enough to continue his speech; now he gazed at us, shifting in a human way as to not frighten Edward. To his credit, Edward listened as one enraptured by the most interesting tale ever told. With his change in posture complete, Carlisle began again.

"Rosalie too has her tale, I would not expect her to share much of it anytime soon. Let her be, she carried a great burden and she prickles to share. Her great rescue was Emmett, she sang to him as my Esme's heart did for me. Alice and Jasper arrived in fifty-eight, in Idaho, with her visions and Jasper's emotional control as their calling cards. I became the head of my varied and talented family. I felt like Job at the end of the book, with all my dreams restored and beyond. My one wish was for my dear Bella, my daughter, to find her heart again. Edward, I must tell you, our world is not without it's own perils – werewolves, other vampires and the Volturi. They seal us to secrecy, our code to live in quiet separation, without human knowledge of our gifts, or their knowledge of my family's talents, for that matter. What else can I tell you son? Bella has chosen"

Edward sat up straighter at the final words. "Chosen. Chosen me. Does that mean?"

"No Edward, I'm not changing you. It's not" I began

"It's not my decision?" He cut into my words.

Carlisle cut in, "Edward, I have never changed anyone with consent, but only at the moment of peril. Sometimes I wonder if I was selfish in my action, but I cannot believe I was made and remade to be evil. Actions speak louder than words."

Edward slowly let go of my hand as he stood behind me. His hands came to rest on my shoulders; lightly squeezing what he could as he spoke. "Dr. Cullen, sir, that is a lot to process. Why do you share this with me? Why do you trust me with this knowledge?"

"You said it yourself. Trust. We must trust; knowledge of who we are is our bond and our pledge. You must understand in order for you to keep your end, keep Bella, safe."

"Safe from who?"

I had to help him understand. "Edward, I have never been to Italy."

"Italy? Bella I thought that Transylvania was the big vampire place?"

"No, Edward, the Volturi lead from Italy." Carlisle answered.

"Edward, Alice, Jasper and I have only heard the stories of Voltera and Marcus, Aro and Caius and their guard. Aro likes talented vampires, not my piloting skills…"

"He likes? He keeps." Edward spoke with the conviction of the informed and firm. He understood.

I hated to drop the other shoe, but I had to confirm my suspicions with Carlisle. "They look for talent from time to time. They use spies."

Edward's eyes flashed emerald anger. "Ms T. D. Enali"

Carlisle's eyes registered a jolt. The possibility was chilling. Tanya knew all about us.

**_A/N: So, Tanya is in town. Edward has a lot on his plate, plan a perfect prom evening, study for finals, consider becoming a vampire - no wait, Bella's on the fence - or is she?_**

**_Rewards come to those who share their thoughts - press that button - even if you just want to rant that this took too long! I agree._**


	19. Chapter 19

**I'm Baaack - and yes I am working on this more often - see you on the flip side**

Chapter 19

**Where the wild Fern Grows…**

James shot Tanya a dirty look as she peered across the marshlands. Hunting to keep his eyes gold and maintain his human façade was wearing thin on his three-hundred-year-old self. He was well aware he would not be in this predicament, if Victoria had not abandoned him. He still gave her the benefit of the doubt. She was much more fun than this, this_ Teacher_ for crying out loud. Worse, he'd found himself in the role of student.

He'd tried to help Tanya, when a human had figured out what she and her sisters were up to, with the love 'em and leave 'em routine. He thought it would be fun. It was a little surprising the human was so quick and clever. Out in the sunlight, never alone; that little jerk had made his life hell. His crazy blog posts had caught the eye of the Volturi. Lauraunt was close with Tanya's sister, Irina, so as a favor he said he'd get the situation under control. Jane and Felix beat him to the punch, and took him along with the last two guys that Tanya and Kate had dated.

It was a shame that their fishing boat had capsized. No one in town realized the three even knew each other.

James covered the local college, Peninsula had a nice enough selection of night classes and he fit in as another commuter student. Tanya wanted him out of Forks as much as possible, supposedly to keep her cover intact. He knew she knew the big coven in the area, and for now he was fine with keeping the distance. For now.

Tanya was not concentrating on the hunt. She was thinking over her time here in Washington. It had been awkward, avoiding Bella and visiting with Carlisle and Esme, explaining her 'situation' with the Volturi and her odd commission.

She had come with the explanation that a _guest _of the Volturi was a bit special. To be truthful, the person had grabbed Aro somehow and shocked him with a vision of _Change to change all. _Now, Aro was obsessed with finding the human before there was a chance of this mysterious person slipping under the radar.

Tanya was sent, to overcome her edgy, in the eyes of the Volturi, behavior and James was under the same sentence from his and Victoria's escapades in Oregon. So after today's hunt, it was time to visit with Carlisle again. Time to come clean to the good doctor.

"James, come on. I'm not going to bother trying to hide from you. I think you should meet the Cullens. I just want to get this done and be left alone."

"Tanya. You are one of the most experienced of our kind I have ever met, not the most but close. Still you don't scare me."

"James, only Italy scares me. I know you don't share my sensibilities. You've adapted well to my diet, so you can do your part. I'll give you that. Still, you haven't found anything to report-have you?"

"They are just going to show up again-aren't they?"

"Do you even care if they are holding Victoria?" Tanya was still hurting from the way she had been used by James to needle his girl. She had though James a bit handsome and chivalrous when he had seemingly interceded in her attempts to end things. She had not seen her in Italy, when she had been summoned. The fact that he was no more than a manipulative jerk left a sour taste in her mouth. She eyed him, tapping her foot to indicate she expected an answer.

"I suppose I do. She's a lot of fun, and useful from time to time."

"Fine. So, before they can just show up–with a bag of her ashes-let's use our resources wisely. I want to."

"Don't be foolish, they'll use it against you."

"I'll only ask the questions I need. I've got a good 600 years on you, and I still move and work in the human world with ease. You can barely sit in a night class."

-2HISOAT-

Carlisle and Esme were the only ones remaing at the house when Tanya and James knocked on their door. They were at the door at that moment, preparing to leave so Tanya barely knocked, the heavy door swinging wide at her touch.

"What a surprise, Tanya."

"Carlisle, Esme. This is James. Spare a moment? We need to talk."

**So, we edge forward. Next Up, a character we don't hear from very often, do we? Press that button and let me know how you really feel about my long dry spell... Thanks Reb!**


	20. Chapter 20  A Father's Point of View

**Greetings from my new digs in Delaware! - say hi if you are anywhere near Wilmington. Now I have to go run and get a few things for the new place (A man bathroom - NO storage NONE AT ALL!)**

Chapter 20

A Badge wearing, BS Detecting point of view…

It was a few days later, things seemed calm to us for the moment. I mean Edward seemed back in the regular routine after the big commotion over Prom. I mean was it that hard to ask a girl to a dance?

If it is the right girl, I guess it is. Now he's gone on several trips to Port Angeles for shopping? Well, I guess he's a planner and detail oriented; that's a skill I never applied to my marriage, so I guess he got my instincts and Renee's smarts as how to use them.

I had noticed the piano tuner truck here too. I guess the old upright in the basement survived the years of neglect. I came home and had heard him playing the other night. The basement was really organized too–I guess some of the Cullen kids helped. Now they have a place to "hang" closer to school. Never thought I would see the day. It makes me happy. I had never allowed myself the luxury of imagining my son here on a long-term basis.

Maybe I'd see him a couple of weeks, here and there, in a year. Perhaps I would have a chance before he leaves for, or after he's in college. That is all I'd dared hope for before he came to Forks. Now nearly every day I get to see my son.

Ah, nearly, nearly as in Bella. I can't complain. She seems nice, level headed. She's a pilot; I learned a while back from Jack, my deputy, that she flies a lot of the Angel Flights for the hospital.

That's the way the Cullens work; generous to a fault. I finished changing and securing my weapon and headed downstairs.

Bella and Edward were in the kitchen, Edward was cooking fish and Bella was setting the table, for three.

"Dad, Bella's going to join us for supper, OK?"

"Sure Edward. It smells good," I answered as I watched Bella lightly roll those, well, those amber eyes? I listened to Edward's chuckle.

Dinner was pleasant. Edward can cook and he didn't seem perturbed that Bella ate like a typical girl. We got on to talking about choices after high school; Edward was still planning to apply for pre-med at a couple of places. I also encouraged him to consider Julliard. He could always do a transfer if it wasn't for him, but I know he has talent, so it's worth a try. I know I surprised him with that. He's not a small town boy. He's been all over and I know he wants to spread his wings. That he got from his mother. I'm content if the farthest I have to travel is Olympia.

I listened to them talk noticed that Bella was pretty non-committal. Edward was so excited about so many possibilities. Dr. Cullen was going to recommend him for a scholarship. I let him know I had funds for the college tests and applications.

It was a pleasure to see his smile. I observed Bella some more. She could sit still as stone when she was thinking. Sometimes she would almost glow as she spoke – that was when I saw what Edward saw in her. She was so unconscious or unaware of her beauty, it was almost as if she hid it. She'd look at Edward and almost transform. I thought beauty was in the eye of the beholder, but maybe that's the mark of something more than a high school crush.

Still, at the end of the evening I had a feeling that things were in a sea of change.

**Charlie is very observant, but hey he is an officer of the Law, right? So, make me smile and press the button!**


End file.
